Knock knock,
"Hey, why do you always come to Gangwon-do to drink... Are you crying?"
"...since you cried, sit down."
"Hair... are you okay?"
"...We didn't break up. We weren't dating."
“Why on earth? No, who came first?”
"That person..."
" what ?!! "
” … ”
I think it's surprising news even for those around me. Of course. The person who loved me so much and expressed it so much... is now pushing me away.
Even I, the person involved, can't believe it right now, so how much more so would that senior not believe it?
“You..so like this”
"If I were in my right mind, I'd just keep crying. I thought maybe if I were a little crazy, I'd start laughing..."
"Kim Yeo-ju..."
“So, please drink with me today.”
“.. Oh, okay, I see.”
So, I continued to drink with my senior, one glass at a time, and before I knew it, I'd downed over five bottles by myself. My senior seemed fine, since he had a high tolerance, but I, of course, ended up completely drunk.
“Ugh.. sob, what should I do?”
"Hey..! There are a lot of men in the world. You'll forget them quickly."
".. It took so long to forget Yoon Jeong-han, and it hurt without fail during that long time."
".. The problem is that I was able to forget that person, Yoon Jeong-han."
“ … ”
Yes. The reason I can't forget that person is because he was the one who could so beautifully decorate my once desolate world, which seemed like it could never be colored or decorated again.
And above all else..
(( I guess we are destined. ))
Because he was truly a person who felt like fate. It was a person who seemed destined to meet again, even traveling halfway around the world. That's why he's even more unforgettable.
“If it really was fate... If it really was like that, I wish you would appear before my eyes just once...”
“Kim Yeo-ju...”
thump,
"Really... just once in front of my eyes... huh"
” … “
“Please show up just once..”
With these words, my memory was completely cut off.
The next day,
".. oh my head"
When I opened my eyes, I was home, and my makeup was gone. My clothes were still the same... I guess I wanted to protect my skin.
I quickly showered, changed clothes, and went to sober up. But where else did this senior sleep if not at my house...?
“I’d like some Seonjihaejangguk here~”
" yes ~ "
The last thing I remember from yesterday was that I was still running... of course I was dragging my feet
After a while, the hangover soup came out and I drank the soup first to soothe my upset stomach.
At that moment,
(( This country's food is like stew ))
"..Why do I only remember things like this again"
I remembered the time we went to Uruk together to get over a hangover. Now, no matter what I did, all I remember was him. I really can't even get over a hangover anymore.
In the end, I just drank some of the soup and put down my spoon.
How did it really end up like this? Memories of that person filled my entire life, and my world was so filled with them that I had nowhere to escape.all.
Even in my dreams, I couldn't escape him. Every time I fell asleep, the moment we broke up would replay over and over again, and when I opened my eyes, they were filled with tears.
I felt really sick. It was a very serious illness that no one but him could cure. And it was very painful.
Back home, I lay on the sofa and stared at the ceiling. Right now, the answer was to think about nothing. If I did, I'd inevitably end up thinking about him.
I spent two weeks like this, becoming completely numb to the pain of grief. No, I brainwashed myself into thinking I was numb, so I could go to the hospital and work.
"Mr. Kim, the next patient is coming in."
" yes ~ "
I forced myself to take on more patients and deliberately extended my treatment hours. I skipped meals and worked, losing weight day by day. But it wasn't so bad. At least I didn't feel bad thinking about him.
I thought physical pain was much better than mental pain.
This boss was discharged from the hospital recently. I was in the hospital room the day he was discharged, hoping I might run into him, but he was nowhere to be seen.
Perhaps he'd anticipated my presence. I'd always thought I was smart. It was so annoying that he'd use that smart brain even in situations like this.
“Teacher Kim, aren’t you being too hard on yourself these days..?”
"It's okay. I've tried harder than this in hospitals."
"Still. Try going in early today."
"Haha, yes. Thank you for your concern."
Thanks to Nurse Su's fervent concern, I was finally granted early leave and was able to leave work earlier than usual. As someone who had no hobbies, the sudden freedom I had was quite difficult.
I left work early because they told me to rest, but I can't rest anywhere. It always felt like I was resting when I was with that person...
"Hey. You're thinking about that guy again."
It's truly incurable. No matter how much I struggle, it won't get better. Now, I've given up. No matter what I do, it won't get better.
I cry and fall asleep every time, but why can't I forget that person?
You can curse me and criticize me all you want. I just miss him so much right now. You can hate me, but please, just once, in front of my eyes... please...
At that moment,
ping,
” ..!! “
Kwadang,
Suddenly, I heard a beeping sound and collapsed on the spot.
—
Swish,
“..here”
When I opened my eyes, I was in a familiar hospital room. It was our hospital. Ah... I collapsed.
at that time,
Knock knock,
"Are you coming to your senses? Do you remember who I am?"
"Yes... You're the hospital director."
"Ha.. Thank goodness there's nothing wrong with the head on the CT scan. How could a doctor collapse on the street and be in his own hospital ambulance right now.. "
" .. sorry. "
"I didn't mean to hear that. I..."
” ..? “
“..I was worried. Quite.”
“..!! Are you worried..?”
Why is the hospital director worried about me? When did he make me work like a dog? Didn't he hate me?
"Yes. So, if you find it difficult to take on duty in the future, just say so. And don't risk your life protesting like you did today."
“.. Oh, yes. I will keep that in mind.”
I guess you mean you were worried that I would die from overwork and the hospital's image would be tarnished. Yeah... But you don't have to worry, because I did it because I wanted to.
“My luggage is...”
"Oh, your guardian already packed your luggage. It's probably in the cabinet. Now that I think about it, I don't see your guardian. He seemed really worried earlier."
"My guardian..?"
Where is my guardian here..? It can't be mom or dad, is it senior Choi..?
“Is that the guy with black hair and double eyelids?”
“No. I mean that person from back then.”
“That person..?”
” That soldier at that timeThat's right. I was complaining to Professor Kim...
"..!! What did you say..?"
"I suddenly can't remember your name, but..."
at that time,
Knock knock,
“Oh, it’s already time for rounds..?”
" .. lie "
“Are you lying? Isn’t that the same soldier from back then?”
"No.. I'm not saying that's a lie"
” … “
“It feels like a lie that that person is right in front of my eyes.”
I carefully got out of bed and walked towards him, carefully touching his cheek with trembling hands. Just in case it was another dream. Just in case it was one of those dreams that had tormented me.
But in that moment, the pleasant warmth felt like all the strength in my body was released.
"Really... it's real"
” … “
"Really... it's you."
Gulp,
Swish,
“ … ”
This is the destiny I have longed to see so much.