I LOVE YOU, MY FAIRY OF SHAMPO
I Love You, My Fairy Of Shampoo

마디연준범규
2021.09.11Views 25
"Really?! I love you, Daniel!!!!" Ben joyfully said. I told him that I passed my exam and now we're in the same department.
"You're really happy being with me" I teased him while hugging him from the back. He nodded and turnround to see my face. He planted kisses on my forehead, nose, cheeks and lips.. He smiled at me.
"I love to be with you and I am the happiest everytime we're together" He explained while smiling and looks like imagining something..
"What are you thinking?" I laughed and asks him in malicious tone.
"No-nothing? Yah!! You're the one who's thinking something!! Perverted!!" He was about to run but I hugged him tighter.
"Planning to run? You can't get off of me, Benieee" I bit his earlobe and breathe on his neck.. I felt him shake.. HAHAHA
"Want to pee?.. oh? Are you blushing, loves?" I turned him 'round and he hid his face with his hands.. he looks cute, I'm giggling HAHAHA.
"Stop teasing me, pervert.." he whispered. He bit my arm and ran. I laughed when he was about to slip on the floor. He went to his room.
"Cute" I said. I'm so lucky to have him..
"Open the door, loves!" I shouted then knocked.
"Go away, Daniel!!!" He answered. I can imagine how pissed off he is.
"Come on, Ben!! Don't hide yourself blushing because of the temptati-
"Damn!" He stopped me from talking and opened the door. He even cuss HAHAHA
"Hi there, Ben. I love you" I really love to embrace him. I smelled his hair.
"Shit.. what's your shampoo again?" I asked him while sniffing his hair. I'm addicted.
"Stop! You might sniff my hair out of my head!!!!" He gently push me.
"You're mean!" I said and pouted. He kissed me. Look who's naughty.
Those memories broke my heart more. The memory that we have, when things are not yet complicated.. we can't add more memories. My tears fell, my hands are shaking. I feel the cold air from the aircondition here in the hospital room. Ticking clock, the sound of lifeline machine and my love breathing so heavily.
Have you ever wished to hold someone's hand longer than before? Hold it like you don't want to let go? Do you know the feeling of losing someone in unexpected time? Do you know how to move on even if it's hard?
"Hold me tightly. Don't go, okay? Keep yourself awake.. don't sleep. Stay longer with me. Let's live together happily" I said when I saw him slowly closing his eyes. I am holding his hands tightly, sniffing his hair.. I love the smell of it, I love everything about him. I can't afford to lose him.. Not yet.. I know someday he will, but please not now.. I'm not even prepared.. I can't lose him.
"You're the best part of my life" he said in weak voice. He smiled at me showing that everything will be okay.. My tears started to fell as he kissed my hand so gently and full of love.
"You're also my everything that I don't want to lose... (breathing hardly) you're my happiness.. (sobbing) I love you so much.. I love you and it will never change.. until my last breathe.. I still gonna choose you if I've been reborn. I will still choose a man like you.." He's crying quietly.. smiling painfully hoping that he can stay longer but it's obvious that he is tired..
"I'm sorry.. Sorry if I'm selfish.. I want you to stay with me.. I want you to stay longer.. awake.. but I know you're fighting too much.. you're tired" I can't help but to mourned loudly. I love him so much.. I can feel the pain in my heart.. It hurts to see him suffering.. Looking at him and can't do anything..
I'm still crying and touching his soft hands.. He whispered how he loves me.. He is sorry..
I heard a sound from the life machine. It's a straight line now.. I looked at him closed eyes and have a tears on his face. I cried too much.. Embracing him.. Kissing him and apologizing..
"You're done suffering.. You're no longer in pain but I am.. Help me.. don't let me love you too much that I can't move on anymore.. I love you so much.. I'm sorry for making you stay knowing that you're in pain.. I love you, my fairy of shampoo."
Steve and Terry came. They saw me crying and kissing him on his forehead.
"He's gone. Be strong, Daniel-
"Be strong?! The fuck! Steve how can I be strong?! He's gone.. (punching the wall) I saw him dying and I can't do anything.. to save him.. to make him stay.. to help him not to feel any pain (he's still punching the wall. Blood on his hand marked on the cream coloured wall.)
"STOP THAT SHIT, DANIEL! Look at your hands! Do you think Ben wants to see you suffering like that because of him? To see you hurting yourself because of him? Do you think you can have him again if you do that?! Of coursed NOT! So bro, stop doing that nonsense. You're a piece of shit. You look so reckless!" Steve and Terry hold him. Stopping him to punch the wall again. To make him calm.
"Kai and Auntie will be here at dawn. Rest and fix yourself, we will look for him"
"I don't want to. Just go home, I'm fine staying here with him"
Terry and Steve shut their mouth.
2:00 am, Ben mother named Bea and his cousin Kai came and crying.
"Ben (crying) sorry, mom is not with you when you're experiencing all the pain.. sorry for being not here.. you never get the chance to see me before you close your eyes.. I'm really really sorry. I'm so mad at myself, I'm so broken hearted. I love you so much, Son. I'll miss you... I can't.. I can't bare to see you like that, lifeless.. I can't afford to lose you (embracing.. crying on him)" shoulders going up and down. sniffing and sobbing.
"Sorry, Ben. For not doing my promised. To make Auntie came at your birthday. Sorry.. I'll miss you. We will never forget you" Kai said while crying.
"Sorry, Auntie.. For not taking good care of him-
"Ssshhh. It's not your fault, Daniel. He's sick. It's not about you. Don't blame yourself. Ben loves you so much. I know he will miss you."
Losing someone that you treasured is painful. The one that you love the most. The one that makes you happy, the one who makes you inspired and the one who loves you too. It's hard to let go but it is needed. You can't own someone. All things or people has a limitation, if it's their time to leave.. then let go.. holdin on at them at the very last moment will make the things more complicated. It's okay not to forget them, but let them go and move on. They will be forever in your heart even if they are gone, they still have a place in your heart and mind.
I Love You, My Fairy Of Shampoo au. A work of fiction and male to male character affection.
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