Memory Manipulation Club: txt [Short Story]

First Love's First Love (2) - Subin

(Soobin's perspective)





After I broke up with my first love
I was sitting alone in a room that had turned cold,
Breakups are much more painful and empty than I thought.




It was a terribly incompatible relationship.

When I played music, they frowned and said it was loud,
Whenever we went to eat spicy food, he would get annoyed and suffocate me.


It was the end when I was completely exhausted from a relationship where I always had to endure things.




"Why do you always only think about yourself?"




The sharp words he threw at me last
It pierced my ear like an awl, and honestly, I felt incredibly wronged.

I'm also trying to accommodate you in my own way.
I mean, it chipped away at my whole self.



But at that moment,
There was someone who flashed strongly through my mind like a lie.
A name I had forgotten for a while,
Han Yeo-ju.




No matter what music I play
You, who listened with sparkling eyes as if hearing the most precious thing in the world.


Even while secretly gulping down water repeatedly while eating spicy food
You, who used to smile and say it was delicious in front of me.


When I play basketball, I silently sit in the cold gym stands
You, who protected me and were happier than I was.




We really match well in both taste and personality. Right?




Come to think of it again, the innocent things my past self said to you
That cruel and selfish sentence became a boomerang
It felt like it was crushing my heart.






Yeoju, I'm sorry I only realized this now.


It wasn't that your personality matched mine.
You cherish me so much that you kill your entire world
It turns out they were accommodating me completely.



Back when I was immature, your tearful tenderness
I thought it was obvious.



It's really late, but,
That there was no one in this world who understood me as completely as you did.

I could barely breathe as a belated wave of apology and regret washed over me,
Yeoju, your face that I haven't even contacted for years
I missed you like crazy.




When I came to my senses, my hands were already trembling.

I opened the chat window with you that had been gathering dust for years,
I stared blankly at your profile picture, which had become as unfamiliar as the years that have passed.




"How are you?" "Sorry, Yeoju." "I suddenly thought of you."
I don't know how many times I stayed up all night writing and erasing.



Yeoju.
How selfish it is to contact you at this hour of the morning
Even though I know deep down that it is a shameless thing to do,
The one you gave I miss that unconditional warmth so much
I ended up pressing the send button.



My terrible regret, which flew away breaking the long silence.

Yeoju, are you asleep by any chance?