I don't want to let it go, I got accostumated to solve everything in the same day but with Baika... Ana... she is completely different, a small issue can last a week or over to settle it completely. Why? Because we are very, very different... but I can't stay without her and I noticed she felt the same way about me.
I am accostumated to be pressured, to do this or that. To be more, to hurry, to have it now. Must be perfect, should be amazing... I don't have time to loss. I have a name, a pride a dream a plan, strategies... vengeance against the things that I don't tolerate... issues. I got issues, she also have but I don't mind because I don't understand why... something so random can make us apart and we had to fight.
Knowing that I was on the wrong... I don't even have any excuse to show everyone my unnecessary jealously, my worries to lose her... not exactly because another man ( I wouldn't leave her alone until she was begging for my love again... no matter how horrible I should become, if I loved her anymore, my pride is too big now).
I love her... I truly do and having secrets wasn't helping me. I forced her to stick with me when she only sees red... the control over her own feelings is scary sometimes. So I learned by force to not worry if she leaves... she is protecting me from my own stupidity doing something that I knew she wouldn't like.
I asked her in marriage, she accepted because it was my desire and she doesn't believes that will hold us together. That was our wish, to be together, to be a family, to trust... I shouted my irrational words... claiming her attention, my fears to lose her even if she promises the opposite.
She should called me everything, any of those nice things she always says, my actions are low and unnecessary. Still I did, and my friends understood my reasons but she can't because I am lying to her everyday keeping secrets about Lee and the danger he represents.
Under pressure she fights, nobody owns her, nobody can control her if she doesn't wanna. It's a personal election she made to love me, to care, to be nice, to give give me one million and half of opportunities to negotiate with her. Gives me more reasons to let her stay in my life forever than necessary to feel that I love her, that nobody can be her, take her place. I can have everything from her... but can't force on her my volunteer.
In our so called honey moon... never bolted like she did today, always warned me enough to stop myself, pouted to not be easy to convince because I can seduce her. It's not a secret I call her attention over any other hability of her to set her rights.
I have done enough to know... everything because she doesn't hides anything and she knows I do but believes it's my past, my rights, my job... nothing out of the ordinary that will solve itself with time. Things worked for us... the most I share, the most she loves.
That's why I want her... my dark side is nothing she fears, my wife can be stain and nobody else will notice... nobody really wants to know either. She is just a girl, Jin have seen... have played with fire and Jungkook can sense something but he preferred to be ignorant about it. I see it in his eyes he learned from me, from us... that's why he is so powerful sometimes that can give his everything without fears and be adamantly cruel to those that break his heart, his trust and his respect.
Jin does whatever he wants, that savage dude, so carelessly, so free, so fresh... no wonders it shows on his face... that handsome man, that doesn't see any good on him but learned how to love himself enough to be successful and so nice that sometimes I get angry and call him idiot. I can't be like him, he can't be like me... we respect it. That's why Baika is not in the middle, she is just my wife and the woman he learned to love like a moron does... without any reason or explanation.
- I don't forgive you... stop looking at me with those eyes - she said softly
- what eyes? - I played around
- Those... that means you have set a plan on stone... that when I will be able to see what it is, is going to be too late... I am on your hands and limits my limits will be so blurred again that I don't know what I can become... Yoongi... haven't you pushed enough? You ended all hurt last time... Jin got involved somehow... why Jungkook was behaving like a psycho boyfriend today? He ignores my guts 99% of the time because I am your trouble not his trouble ... what are you doing?
- Don't ask... just forgive me and love me back.
- Yoongi... don't start... I know you.
- You do? I don't think so, beautiful...
- Yoongi don't be cruel... what is wrong with you?
Baby's P/V:
Yoongi said something really pretty, what should I do to have the superpower to be on his thoughts and convince him to not do it, whatever he is scheming will kill him.
- Just a small treat Yoongi, tonight I am yours, but promise me you aren't going to do anything crazy.... you are a mess today.
- I love you - he said again.
- Shhh... I know, I wouldn't be so irritated if you refused to correspond my feelings... Yoongi... I love you... but you're not telling me yet, doesn't it ?
- you are very smart... everything is fine, don't worry - Yoongi said softly
- you too, sneaky boy... why you said I wasn't being serious about my studies? That wasn't necessary... why are you so irritated anyways?
- Bonita... no preguntar... -[# beautiful... don't ask] - he didn't said it correctly but he... in Spanish... why? How is possible? He don't asks... me... Tae-tae... I helped him... but still...
- Yoongi....
- What I have to do? Just forgive me... I know that I've acted wrongly - he says
- But why... why would you? I feel like I'm not doing my part right, because I don't want anyone else - I said, I started applying my body milk on my legs as I talked to him.
Yoongi pulled the T- shirt Jin has convinced him to wear during the dinner, I was very distracted looking at that exposed skin, so I'm not so sure how he convinced him exactly ...if he was trying to seduce me he managed really well.
- You like me that much? - Yoongi took the bottle from my hands I was dripping it to the floor.
- sue me - I said and he laughed cleaning my mess and finishing the job that I started.
- Aren't you angry with me? You like this better?- He massages
- If a meteor kills you, I won't be able to forgive myself being angry and missing an opportunity to do this - I kissed him and he devored me in response.... Yoongi's kisses are amazing.
- that is not going to happen... never - he said hugging me.
- why?... disturbs you to be the one murdered - I teased him.
- ... we will be always together, glued, do you understand me? - he jokes undressing me.
- glued... you will end very tired of me if we were - I said
- I'm not so sure about that... So... are you going to forgive me or not? - he insisted kissing my neck
- do you regret anything about today? - I asked
- maybe... a few things about it...
- maybe I should forgive you then... you are one of the little that can make me disappointed ... Yoongi think I have been doing my best to make your fears disappear... I don't want anyone else.
- I know... try not to do things I don't do for you... it drives me insane lately... I love you - he said really softly
- lately? Something happened to.... - I felt his fingers over my lips, I know that is the thing he doesn't want to tell me.
SUGA'S P/V:
She on propose or not, makes me feel loved, great... my love... my angel... here with me ...trying to understand me... don't asking me anything just because she looked at me and knows... she knows everything that is there to know... a few details she never cared about... she doesn't push me.
- I love you Yoongi... - she said softly in my ear, sometimes on my right others on my left, the words she uses are different every time and on the situation, but she never misses to say something I like to hear at random times.
Tonight I needed that... to feel her mine and close... I was sure she would let me have her, surely tried to set her point but she didn't protestested much even if she doesn't forgive me easily.
Isn't nothing important to overcome... she will come around... I wanted to know why she didn't dropped the idea of that exam. She can go to university using other methods, this was just to be on the shoes of the people from here that studied hard get a high score, go to famous university and think they have done a great thing.
- Me too beautiful... I love you - I said to her, I stopped thinking on other things to focus on her, pleased with me, to be in my arms, in my bed or whatever place I want to take her.
- Yoongi... why are you crying? I am here.... I will be always... even if... - I kissed her before she says more, moving closer to be more intimate with her.
Being a couple not always means that I will definitely do use of that on my behalf... my dearly lover learned that the hard way... she have been patient with me. I don't let my passion and desires to dominate my life, as if I was some kind of animal.... sometimes when I let it go... it's how it feels like.
- Can we? - I asked
- Yes, please me - she answered immediately
- okay... - I said, I looked for something in our bedside table, once in place... I used all my energy on that... to please her... myself... I don't know anymore.
Jin's P/V:
- Chiquita ... are you sure they wouldn't mind if you bring so many guest unannounced? - I asked to Baby since we don't have anything to do this morning we are following her around.
- I will tell them you are my manager, Jungkook should be my bodyguard and Yoongi... my vital support, I need him to stay alive umm? - she touched his leg, Yoongi was driving in silence.
- what? I missed something ? - Jungkook just awakened... it's amazing how he can be functional without being aware of the rest of the world... that it's surely a superpower.
- good morning, sleepy beauty - Baika says
- You said that twice already.... where are we going? - JK said and we laughed.
-To her photo session, we can have an early lunch before going to the agency - Yoongi said.
- sounds good... why are you so dazzling today? - he asked to Yoongi
- I don't know what do you mean, I haven't done anything special - Yoongi sighed, he can't get the compliments, because he is totally relaxed and it reflects on everything, on his persona and personality.
- why we have to wait? Are they a superstars or what? We arrived first - someone was protesting as we were guided to the set. The photographer didn't minded our presence, we have worked with him before and just said that elite people always end on the same circle of friends.
- Hey! The first model arrived! Measure her, but I think she can wear Miu Miu's today... be light with the makeup, we want to promote the clothes not her pretty face... sorry... things are like this darling - the style director said loudly as Baika walked behind her with a smile on her face and we were following her around trying to not disturb anyone.
- guys... you can eat over there, and have anything from the catering table, don't be shy... I never imagined to see you here. Surely your agency is like a big family - one assistant said to us as he was standing in front of Yoongi, my brother is one of the smallest members of our group but seemed really tall among the people we met.
- Oh, thanks... sorry for the inconvenience we caused... coming along without asking - Yoongi bows his head a little as he says that with that stern face.
- eh?... Omg... you are even better looking in person than I remember - he suddenly blurted without thinking... he couldn't stop looking at our faces.
- Thanks, we try to take care of our skin so your work shows - I said to distract him from Yoongi, at any given opportunity he would poke him to see if he was real. He was really quiet and static to not cause any problem around his wife.
Some members from Stray Kids were there waiting as their manager ignored their questions, I greet them bowing my head and could see Jungkook doing the same as me as he looked at everything set around, Yoongi just took a seat without looking at anything or anyone around... Just his phone, surely I want to destroy that thing sometimes.
Jungkook's P/V:
- she looks exactly as before she arranged her hair... does that makes any sense? - I hushed to my friends
- Her beauty stands out... dark and long hair it's what the 90% of girls have, they are promoting the clothes... it's normal to do that to models, specially on magazines, they keep asking her to turn her face and not look at the camera - Jin said.
- that's stupid... the prettier the model, the most I would like to look nice as them - I commented.
- We are asian... she is like a roasted bean of coffee - someone dared to say.
- Being pale made you popular to get lovers?- Yoongi suddenly asked and everyone was trying to not to laugh, it was almost like calling him ugly in front of everyone... Yoongi looked as white as a piece of paper so among the presents he should be the most popular just by his skin color as the worker suggests.
- please... bandage her bust... she looks, too curvy and teens shouldn't look like a grown up - someone said and quickly everyone started to work... she must be someone important. But the little bunny was looking uglier by the minute... why they do that to her?
- Don't show your teeth, don't smile - she ordered later, Baika didn't said anything, just followed the orders immediately.
- why she doesn't protest? It's exactly the opposite as we do, we have to look nice, to show off, anything that implies us being happy with the product we promote - I hushed to Jin hyung
- we sell our face and name to the company that want to promote a product, because we are popular but not because we can do any job like she does... they can make her as ugly as they want and she will obviously do anything they command to have the pictures they want.
- she looks pretty on anything - Yoongi startled us.
- Oh! here are the other models! Finally.... so pretty girls over there take seat ... take a seat - someone said and we looked to the girls, they looked really young.
- I didn't know you had business here, this is going to be the new group of girls... you will see them around in one of the new branches of the agency a manager said to us.
- We have to share a vehicle, we aren't working here today just they invited us in to not wait in the car - Jin said
- Seriously? Who is working here then? - the manager asked.
Another girl from our agency came to model... some will wear the same as our friend but in different colors, they were being prepared to look pretty good using all the necessary to make them shine instead.
- It's not fair... she doesn't even has tits and thay are making fake ones for her - I pouted.
- I told you modeling it's not the same as being Idols... we sell our face and they are just mannequins - Jin repeats and I don't like my Bunny has to look like a pumpkin around other girls that are artist from our agency... just like her.
SUGA'S P/V:
- sorry... can you stay a little longer? If the last model doesn't arrives we would like to take your m pictures with this model too - someone asked to Baika as she cleaned her face.
- Oh... I was told to take my leave... the makeup it's gone already - my wife says.
- Don't worry... I understand... sometimes models doesn't come and it's a problem - the worker says
- Okay, I have time until midday, afterwards I have other business... also they have, it's why we are sharing the car... we must be at the same location after I finish here.
- Thanks again... Baby, actually you are the only that never failed us and in case you can't come always looked for someone to fulfill your place, they also were great people.
- no need to thank me... I just do what I can - the worker left and I asked her if she was tired... if she wanted a refreshment.
- sorry, must be so boring to wait until I finish, you can go first if you like, I can hire a taxi - she said to us.
- I'm fine waiting for you bunny bunny ah, we have time - Jungkook said
- Don't worry, you have done it for us until now, today we don't have anything to do now - Jin said
- give me that... you will end like a panda - I said helping her to clean her face.
- what a luxury....- a girl says looking at my actions.
- Baby... come I will wash your hair, even if they use you later you can have your natural style - a hairdresser came to take my wife with her and she thanked me before going with her.
The girl jealous of my wife smiles watching her leave. She was another model, her body was like a white stick sauntered in freckles that the strong makeup made disappear from her face and neck.
- Do you know her?... I heard gossips of her targeting Idols... you should be careful - the girl said as soon as my wife left.
- Careful? I think you should pay less attention to gossips and know your place, you are quite impolite child... nobody asked your opinion.
- Child? I am 27 already... so close to your age... you are so popular that everyone knows everything about you, also that you are single... maybe you are interested on something interesting - she adopted a posture that... she just looked like a cracked cane.
- That's ridiculous.... don't you feel any shame? Talking on her back to us - Jin asked her.
- Don't be nosy, you are worse than a teenager, telling everyone how you like to live like a needlessly decoration... don't you should be the one on shame?- she spited
- A vain an useless man like me... are you telling me that you deserve better? - Jin laughed
- yes... much better - she says.
- I have heard that exist crazy people... first time to met one... are you really calling my brother "needlessly decoration"? - Jungkook couldn't believe the bluntly woman.
- says "the international playboy" that only dates dudes... are you going to denny what everyone really thinks about you... f/
- end that word and I will cut your tongue... fulfill your mouth with something that will solve a few of your problems - my wife says pushing a sandwich into her open mouth.
- I'm here, I'm fine... Ah! Finally you got something in that mouth that is not an old dick - another woman that looked like someone coming straight from a night club.
They started a fight... well that was unexpected but I suppose we can leave now that apparently the woman they were waiting for arrived.
- I'm so sorry for this unfortunate situation - someone came to us to apologize, but I diminished him telling it wasn't their fault and to not to worry... well they will have to stop them before they damage something or ended hurt.
Jin's P/V:
- Today seems like an horrible day... I was called unprofitable already... it's amazing someone would tell me that without knowing me - I said in the car, Jungkook was driving now.
- Just because I don't want to get married? People really believes what they want... I always showed my interest on girls... why she... aish...- Jungkook protestested
- hey... why do you mind what she says? She was trying to seduce me... I should be the one in trouble, that stick was targeting me when you two were here in the same room - Suga seemed really upset about it.
- Since you announced the soloing activities... I noticed that a few people more than having a favorite member... is like waiting to damage the image of the rest... because they can't get the good points, all the members have, just the one they want.... she probably like guys that have something in common with Yoongi - Baika comments
- Aish... people really.... - I sighed. I felt Baika's hand on my shoulder but when I tried to hold it she pulled it away. It hurts, she never did that before... before I broke our friendship and when I needed help she was there but the line was more a wall to me and I know that pushing it it's not the way to arrange things.
Jungkook's P/V:
- Just my luck... Jeon buddy, come, I have a question for you - our friend and bodyguard said as soon as we arrived the agency.
- surely... guys see you in a minute - I smiled to them but I knew he was about to report something that Baika shouldn't hear.
We faked a random conversation until they disappeared from our view. He reported me that they trapped a few people trying to enter our apartments... seems like they are using other methods to locate the princess... some confessed being hired to do it.
- Shit, she will notice if they entered her apartment... looks like she doesn't care... but actually she knows where everything should be... at least you know something about Lee ? - I said
- A few, but the police couldn't get him yet... we have to start thinking on telling her. Seems he will use any method to hurt her - he said
- Thats what he wants? - I asked
- He is acting quite erratic... some where instructed to take her, other to... well, whatever you can imagine can't be as bad as what they confessed. This is so frustrating, can you tell the others? I will be always with her.
- Surely, but Yoongi hyung is going to explode... He... I thought he would kill my friend for taking her out afterwards we advised him to not.
- I'm going to be with her all day... be careful you too... At this rate I can't believe his only target is Baby... Suga, he should be careful too.