Yeonjun fell asleep while I am hugging him. His room remain in silence. Just our breathing sound..
I touched his back, he is sweat. I brush his hair using my hand.. He smell so manly, the smell of alcohol and sweat.. he still smell good for me..
Beomgyu: I'm sorry for causing you this... I want you to be happy again... but I'm afraid.. I may not be the reason of your happiness again.. I want you to find someone... and that someone should be better than me.. never hurt you.. never make you cry.. (tears starting to fell).. I treasured all the memories that we have.. from the very beginning of our relationship.. the day you approached me.. saying that you saw me in your dream.. you know my smell.. you know my smile. When you first saw me, you said I am the one in your dream.. I am happy to met you.. to have you.. but I am guilty.. (sobs) I hurt you so badly.. I broke your heart.. I caused you this.. I am a monster, right? I hurt a lot of people.. especially you and Taehyun.. I.. I never meant to hurt you.. I want to make you happy like before. i want to keep you.. but.. but I can't.. I'm not perfect.. but I need someone to perfect me.. Yeonjun.. thank you.. thank you for always loving me.. for thinking about me.. for caring.. for waiting..
I can't handle it anymore.. I am crying so loudly.. Yeonjun is drunk.. he is sleeping so he can't hear me crying like this.. I tried to stop myself.. but everytime that I am looking at the man in my embrace.. I can't control myself.. I saw his room.. I saw him..
I lay him down on his bed.. put the blanket on him.. I closed the window and clean the trashes.. after cleaning his room, I get a towel and a warm water in the basin.
I am wiping his face.. his hands, arms and body..
Beomgyu: you look really the same whenever you lose a weight.. You still.. (crying) you still the yeonjun I love.. you're still the most handsome guy in my eye..
My tears fell on his face. Shit! He opened his eyes.. slowly.. as he opened his eyes.. he smiled when he look at me..
Yeonjun: you're still here (smiling) I'm happy.. stay with me forever..
And he sleep again..
I kiss him on his forehead.. his cheeks and hands..
Beomgyu: I love you.. but I'm sorry