Diary

09

[ 2016. 12. 29 ]

I couldn’t record the day Seungmin and I slept over at my place

So I took out my diary to record it now

I don’t know if I should write this..

I did it……

Honestly, I thought it would end with just kissing

But suddenly Seungmin started taking off his clothes, so I was shocked

Both he and I

were totally clueless, so at first I was really flustered

Anyway.. somehow that’s how it turned out…

At the beginning, I was so scared

Seungmin said, "If you’re scared, should we stop?" and

he patted my head

It was awkward to stop in the middle

and I was a little curious too

so I just kept going from where we left off

And I was so embarrassed to show Seungmin my body

that I turned off all the lights and left just one small lamp on

As soon as it was over, I showered with Seungmin and fell asleep right away

We’d been out wandering around until late

and we talked a ton

so I guess I must have been pretty tired without realizing it

After sleeping deeply and waking up the next day

I felt like I’d done something wrong

When I asked Seungmin if he felt like he’d done something wrong too

he said he’d had that thought since before showering yesterday

Come to think of it, Seungmin is good at studying too

and he’s a model student who goes to school early

If I were Seungmin

I think it would’ve been even harder not to think that way

Anyway, the next day we got up and made pasta together and ate it

and Seungmin went back home

Being alone made me feel even more guilty for no reason

so after Seungmin left I straightened up the blanket and did the dishes

I even cleaned my room carefully

We were supposed to go on a date a few days later

I’ll be able to see Seungmin’s face, right..? ㅠㅠ