I'm so lonely

1

"sorry."



"yet.."



“I don’t think I can see you anymore.”



“No way..”



“See you in three years.”



“...”



I clenched my fists, my mouth clenched. Something seemed to boil over. Not even keeping my promises... This is too much. I should be crying in this situation, but no tears came. Why? Because I loved her too much? Because I gave her too much? I was so sad, but tears wouldn't flow. It felt like the rope holding me together had suddenly snapped. She said she loved me, that she would protect me for the rest of her life. But in the end, she tore my heart apart and walked away. I stared blankly into the mirror, my eyes blank and emotionless. If it weren't for my appearance, which everyone praised for its beauty, I would be even more lonely. In reality, nothing was wrong, but my eyes were shedding tears of blood. It was a hallucination, a serious hallucination. I could only see it in my mind, already half-conscious, without thinking, and even refusing food. Those who subtly toyed with me, those who subtly ignored me—if I didn't find a metaphor for them, I would die of loneliness. I don't want to live, I don't want to die.



“People can’t all be the same.”



At least I have someone to talk to.
He was such a sweetheart. My heart was warmed and burning again. I was in love, in love. His speech and personality were so affectionate and sweet, I never felt lonely. When I was with him,



“Hey, I like you.”



“You must have had a lot to drink.”



The alcohol was kicking in, but it wasn't like he was just drunk. He didn't think much of my confession, either. Naturally, he had a lover. I tried to calm my throbbing heart. What can I do? I have a lover... I sighed again. He'll accept my heart someday. I slowly closed my heavy eyelids.