(squeak-)
(thud-)
(Beep-beep-)
"no....!"
.
.
"haha..."
"also..."
I've had the same dream for years. It keeps recurring.
I first had this dream when I was in middle school.
βWhere... am I?β
βItβs my first time seeing this place... It feels like a more developed city..β
The place I saw in my dream was a city I had never seen before.
It felt like something more futuristic than the reality I was living in.
I was standing in front of a crosswalk at an intersection overflowing with tall buildings and with roads that were too wide.
There was no sound around me and the world was in black and white.
βWhat is this place....?β
I muttered to myself for a moment, but then I collapsed into a trance at the sight before me.
The traffic light at the crosswalk, which had not yet turned green, was still red, and even though the red light was about to turn green, there was a car speeding towards me.
A very small child, perhaps dropping what he was holding, ran towards the road and disappeared from my sight in that moment.
The next day, and the day after that, and the day after that
I have this dream.
My life is already difficult, but my dreams are the worst.
Because of that, I became more and more tired day by day.
I wanted to ask who the child in my dream was and why he was doing this to me, but before I could even approach him, he had already disappeared from my sight.
It had been several months since I had this dream.
I figured out one thing about this dream.
It was clear that the same scene was repeating itself, but the more I acted differently, the more the results changed.
One day I woke up a little far away and tried to get there faster by running, riding a bike and shouting to people to please save that child.
But even that result was ultimately either the child's death or my death.
Now that I'm a high school student, I haven't had that dream for a while. Is it because I thought my life was better than before?
When I had that dream again in my second year of high school, the only difference was that I could hear surrounding sounds and everything was in a colorful background rather than black and white.
The noise was so loud and clamorous, like hearing something underwater, that it hurt my ears, and in that dream, a child still gets into an accident.
I'm growing up, and that child seems to be the same height and age as me for years. Will there ever be a day when I can save that child who looks like he's only 4 or 5 years old?