We decided not to cross the line (Season 1)

Episode 19. Resolve

Time had already almost reached 10 o’clock.



Instead of going out,

I ordered a sandwich to be delivered,

and sat on the sofa for a while.



I just didn’t want to think about anything today,

or worry about anything.



My body and mind had been under so much tension

that it felt like I was collapsing all at once.






He came over to the sofa and sat down beside me.

He leaned his head back against the sofa and

closed his eyes.





How much time passed...




When I opened my eyes,

I was asleep with my face resting on his shoulder.



He was asleep too, with his arms crossed.





'Well.. I wasn’t the only one who couldn’t sleep..

How much must he have replayed the things we said last night all night.."





When I checked the clock, it was past 3 a.m.

I was startled and woke him up.





"Hunji-ssi, wake up.

It’s already past 3 a.m.

Hurry.."





"Haa...

I was just going to lend you my shoulder for a moment, but I guess I fell asleep."





"Get up and go home quickly."





"Now? We still haven’t eaten anything."





"Ah, right. The delivery from yesterday must still be there..



But still,

eating right now isn’t the issue.

It’s way too late.

Get up and go already."





"Aren’t you going to work the early shift today? Why are you in such a hurry?"





"I don’t know.. I just feel uneasy."





".... Hearing that makes me feel so sorry..."


He went on.




"But.. up until now, while we’ve been in class,

you’ve just treated me as me.

Can’t we keep doing that?"





He was still stuck in a loop.





"I guess this won’t do.

Eat the sandwich, and then we’ll start over.

Today let’s reach a conclusion and wrap things up, the two of us."





I took the bag with the sandwich and drinks,

hanging from the front door handle,



and went inside.

Even before I fell asleep, I was so hungry,





but after taking a short rest, I did have a bit more energy.

As I took out the sandwich and coffee, I thought,

I shouldn’t drag out this conversation with him,



and decided I’d make him give up today.

If he were going to be persuaded that easily,

then I wouldn’t have agonized so long,





or hesitated...

"Hunji-ssi, come here.

I’ll make you some hot coffee instead.

Or should I get you milk or some other drink





from the fridge?"

Acting in exactly the opposite way from what I’d resolved to do,





even I flinched for a moment.

"I’ll make the coffee.

You can use this coffee machine, right?





Where are the capsules?"

I should be cold and mean...





Why do my words keep coming out so kindly...





"Open the first drawer. They should be there."





"Yes, I found them."



He made two cups of coffee and sat down at the table.

I took one sandwich out onto a plate

and with a napkin,


placed it in front of him,

then to break this silence




I connected my phone to the speaker.



Layers' 'Carmen Fantasy'

It was a piece I listened to every day, so without even thinking,





I just naturally hit play.


"Ah... so this is the kind of music you listen to..."





He slowly nodded and smiled.

'What is this.. that calmness? '





Mine is this noisy in my head...'





"Do you like classical music?"





"Yes."





"Which composers do you like?"





"Beethoven and Rachmaninoff."





"Do you go to concerts too?"

"Hunji-ssi, what are you doing now?





Are you listening to music with me?"



"We can do a little small talk while we eat..."

"I saw a Beethoven musical ad while passing Gwanghwamun,





have you already seen it?"





"Yes.. I saw it."





"With who?"





"I saw it with a friend."





"How was it? Who played Beethoven?"

"Park Hyo Shin.

He acted so well... I cried several times...

The person called a genius by later generations

was truly miserable in his own life..





He got neither family nor love..."

"Wow... just hearing that makes me curious..

I wanted to see that musical too...





Can I see it again?"





"I like watching movies and musicals multiple times.."
 
'No.. wait a second





why do I keep talking...'

"Enough, no more talking.





Eat."

"This sandwich is good. This place is a gem!





If you’re not going to eat all of that, can I have half?"



"Okay.. here.."





I put half of my sandwich onto his plate.





"But you like Vivaldi too, right?"





"How do you know?"

When I asked in surprise,







he pointed toward the desk.





"That poster.."

"Ah... the movie poster..

I wanted to see it, but maybe the reaction wasn’t great,





so it got pulled from theaters quickly and I couldn’t."

"Ah.. I see..





Then when it comes to OTT, we can watch it together."





"Hunji-ssi, have you finished eating?"





He quietly looked into my eyes.

"Let me say what I want to say first.

If Hunji-ssi were my age,

or if you didn’t have such a special job like you do now,

I think I’d have looked at our relationship

more positively too,

or maybe I would’ve approached you first.


When I like someone, I tend to confess first, you know.

Even so,

the fact that I didn’t do that means

there are just too many things holding me back.

It means I don’t want to keep running into those obstacles





and still try to go on that road.."





The one who had been looking into my eyes lowered his gaze.

'Right.. I need to go hard at this.





Otherwise I’ll end up being led around..'

"I’ll ask just one last thing..


You mentioned Beethoven earlier, right?

If you were a teacher...

between my name and reputation that will live on forever, the title of genius,

and sharing my life with the person I love beside me right now,


sharing emotions.





Which would you choose?"





I never expected him to ask a question like this.





"...I...the latter..."

"I’d choose the latter too, like you, sir,

and even if it took a long time,

if I became certain about that person, I’d wait,





and do my best."

The moment I heard that,



tears unexpectedly welled up in my eyes.

Why did I cry...?

Was it because when I watched the musical,




I thought of Beethoven’s feelings..?

Not wanting to be found out,





I sprang up and headed for the bathroom.

After wiping my tears and calming myself down a little, I came back out and heard him muttering in a low voice.





"Ah... you really keep making me worry.."





He was setting my phone down.





"Why are you changing the teacher?"