I was the only one flustered, I was the only one who liked them

I've been in love for four years, and I'm finally going to end it now

작가

I first met you at a third-grade math academy.

The moment we met, I almost stopped breathing. He was so kind, and even handsome too.

A lot of girls liked you.

Since we were both at the same math academy, we talked about quite a lot of things.

You’d say useless things like math is hard and I want to go home, but I really liked even that time with you.

When I said a math problem was hard, you’d sit next to me and solve the same problem with me and explain it.

I don’t know how much my heart was trembling when your breath brushed against me while you were explaining.

In fifth grade, you pulled a really funny prank. I called you a gangster, and even now that’s kind of funny to think about.

I’d chase after you, and you’d look at me and run off in a panic. I always lost, but I liked it.

But that was just kindness to you, right? I made it so obvious that I liked you.

But you never knew. Or were you pretending not to know?

I didn’t have the courage to confess. When a really pretty, kind girl at school openly confessed to you, you didn’t even change your expression and turned her down.

As time passed, we ended up at the same middle school, even the same class. We didn’t really talk; we each got along well with our own friends.

The day the first exam scores came out, you ignored your friends and came up to me to talk.

박지훈(1)

How did you do on the test?

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Uh... maybe? How many points did you get?

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I got 87. You?

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Haha, I got 91. We were about the same at the academy, but now I’m doing better? hahaha

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Ah, then next time I’ll win.

I liked having these little talks with you, but there was no next time. It ended right there. You never spoke to me again, and when I talked to you, it was only one-word replies.

Now that I think about it, I wonder if I should’ve tried confessing once. But even if I went back to that time, I don’t think I could do it.

You just saw me as a 'friend.' We even ended up at the same high school by chance, so we’d run into each other now and then, but now we don’t even say hi.

And just like that, my one-sided crush ended in such emptiness.