Light in my Dark
CHAPTER 29
He's kissing me. HAN IS KISSING ME RIGHT NOW. My body was all frozen the moment his lips touched mine.
Han pulled away but he's still holding me close...and his face is still close to me.
Han Jisung
I...I don't know what's on your mind when you blushed like that when we we're eating...but I know it has something to do with Chan.
Soohee
He--
Han Jisung
Let me finish. I know you had a history together...but I won't care about that. Please give me a chance Soohee. Just tell me you will,
Han Jisung
so I can be reassured. I don't want to beg, but please Soohee.
Soohee
Han...I said we could be friends--
Han Jisung
You know that's not what I want.
Soohee
You don't want to be friends?
Han Jisung
Uhh- That sounded wrong. I mean it's good that we're friends and all, but...I want you mine.
My heart is like a wild animal wanting to burst in its cage right now.
Starring in Han's eyes, all I could see is how much he meant every word he said. Sincerity...and I know that look too well.
Because it's the same look Chan gave me when he confessed that he loves me before we got together.
Han Jisung
Soohee? Answer me.
Soohee
Han..I-- I want to..but I'm scared. If I--
Han Jisung
If you're scared that you'll lose me like the way you lost Chan... Wait...actually, you didn't lost him, he lost you.
Han Jisung
I won't let that happen Soohee. Trust me.
Soohee
How could you know Han? We're still young...we have a lot of years ahead of us--
Han Jisung
And I want to spend those years with you in my arms. How could I let a girl go who drives me mad?
Okay. What happened to the annoying Han I know?
Soohee
I don't know...
Han Jisung
Just..let me prove it. Give me a chance.
I should stop denying and lying to myself already...
Han just pulled the trigger. I like him all along, and I spent this past weeks blocking that thought and denying it.
Soohee
Okay. I can't say no after all those things that you said.
Han Jisung
You'll give me a--
I kissed Han's cheek and smiled at him.
Soohee
Yes you dumb squirrel.
Han smiled and was about to kiss me but I covered his lips...
Soohee
Uhh. What are you doing?
Han Jisung
Uhh~ I'm gonna kiss my girlfriend?
Soohee
Whoa slow down. I'm not your girlfriend yet. You said you just wanted a chance.
Han Jisung
Oh. Sorry. I got carried away. But you kissed me!
Soohee
And you kissed me first.
Han Jisung
Wanna do it again?
I can feel my cheeks burning.
Han Jisung
Did I ever told you that you drive me insane when you blush like that? Wait...did you liked me all along Soohee? You--
Soohee
There's no point in denying it so yeah. I did, I was just denying and ignoring it. You're something else Han.
Han Jisung
Can I kiss you again?
Soohee
No.
Han Jisung
Oh come on. Just on tiny kiss on my lips.
*pinch*
Han Jisung
Ow! That hurts! Come here~
Before I can protest...Han kissed me again and felt him smile between the kiss. Then--
Minho
OHMYGOD MY EYES!
Han Jisung
HEY! How long have you been there?!
Minho
Ever heard of "get a room"? Next time, go make out in a bathroom or somewhere private.
Soohee
Can you keep your voices down, my friends doesn't know yet.
Minho
You two are together now? Wow that's fast.
Soohee
No. Not yet.
Minho
Then what's with that kissing just now?
Han Jisung
She can't get enough of me so--
Soohee
Oh wow. Annoying Han is back again.
Han Jisung
Hehe sorry. So yeah..not yet.
Minho
So you're like... courting her? That's old school.
Han Jisung
I don't care. And besides--
Minho
Oh I almost forgot why I came here. You gotta come to the living room quick.
Minho quickly walked away and we followed him. I suddenly felt like I'm going to vomit again.
Minho
They're here!
Lia
Where have you two been?
Han Jisung
Uhh we--
Soohee
Umm I can--
Yeji
You two look like tomatoes.
Lia
Okay let's hear about those later. Now--
The door suddenly opened, then Hyunjin and Felix came in.
Hyunjin
Umm. Chan left.
Felix
We tried to ask him why but he wasn't talking. He called a taxi and I think he's heading home.
Okay. Now I know why I felt something bad. Han and I looked at each other and we both knew what's the reason.
Ryujin
Something tells me that Soohee knows what's up.
Felix
I kinda noticed something as well...
Changbin
What is it?
Felix
So Sohee, Han and Chan were together in the table right? And they talked about something--
Han Jisung
You we're spying on us?
Felix
I was just observing! In case you two argue again, I was going to pull out Soohee and let her join us instead.
Han Jisung
And spying too...
Ryujin
Let him finish!
Felix
So you three we're talking right? Han looked mad, Chan was smirking, and Soohee was looking down and blushing like a tomato-
Han Jisung
A delicious tomato--
EVERYONE: HAN!
Han Jisung
Geez you guys are scary...
Felix
Then Soohee walked away. So Han decided to follow, but before he left, I think he said something to Chan--
Changbin
You we're watching them the whole time?
Felix
Well..yeah it seems interesting and PLEASE STOP INTERRUPTING ME!
Felix
So yeah, but after a few seconds I think, Chan followed. I felt kinda nervous though, I was about to follow when Chan walked back, and I can
Felix
tell he is furious or something. He just walked forward until he reached the front door.
Hyunjin
Then we all felt something wrong so Felix and I followed him to our room. Then we found him with his luggage, walking out.
Lia
Did they argue again Soohee? Did Han pissed off Chan for real this time?
Minho
*laughs* No. You won't believe what I saw when I found them.
Ryujin
Uh-oh..
Soohee
I think I know...he might've saw me and Han....uhh...kissing.
EVERYONE: 😲
HAN & ME: 😳
Yeji
Okay Ryujin...you owe me 50
Ryujin
I-I thought..
Soohee
You made a bet?!
Ryujin
Sooheeee~ Okay why am I tearing up.
Hyunjin
Wow. Our Han grew up.
Lia
I am so happy *laughs*
Soohee
You- you are?
Lia
Well..yeah. After what Chan did to you before, I always wished that the time will come that you'll give him a taste of his own medicine.
Changbin
Lia is scary too.
Soohee
But...I don't know guys I feel bad. I wanted him to join us. I'm going to call him.
Han Jisung
Soohee, he chose to leave.
Soohee
I know, but let me just talk to him. Please.
Han Jisung
...Okay.
I went out to the balcony and dialed Chan's number.
I called a few times already and he's not answering.
I dialed his number again and now I can't reach him. He might've turned off his phone.
Now I have no choice but to call Innie.
***Calling: Jeong In***
Jeong In
Noona! You called! How's your roadtrip? Is hyung having fun? What-
Soohee
Whoa Innie slow down.
Jeong In
Sorry noona. I was just so happy that you called. I'm also happy that you're spending time with hyung, even if you're friends are around.
Great. Now I feel even worse.
Soohee
Uhh. Innie...can you listen to me for awhile? And please don't hang up.
Jeong In
Oh. Of course, and I won't hang up noona.
Soohee
You see...Chan left.
Jeong In
I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind. Why noona?! He shouldn't left you...I mean your group.
Soohee
He...
I'm loss for words. It's so hard to talk when you're about to cry.
Jeong In
It's okay noona. I'm listening. Take your time. Did he do something again?
Soohee
*exhales* It's... actually me. I didn't do it purpose.
Jeong In
I don't... understand.
Soohee
Do you remember Han? When you visited our home? He's my became a good friend towards me for awhile now. Then I...I umm..
Jeong In
*sighs* You like him huh?
Soohee
I'm sorry Innie. Yeah...I did. I was just lying to myself the whole time that I don't.
Jeong In
I... understand. I'm disappointed though. I always wanted you and hyung to end up together.
Soohee
I'm sorry to hear that, but things rarely happen the same way twice. Sometimes it really doesn't. Maybe your hyung and I aren't really...
Soohee
for each other. What happened between us...was a long time ago.
Jeong In
I know. But he shouldn't have left either way. I told him not to give up.
Soohee
Wait..did you two have a plan or something?
Jeong In
I won't call it a plan, just a goal. To not give up on you. He told me that he still loves you, so I told him to prove himself to you.
Soohee
Ohh..
Right now...I kinda want to disappear in the world for a moment.
Jeong In
But now that you like someone else... it will be hard to accomplish that.
Soohee
I don't know what to feel anymore. Okay...just tell your brother to call me, when he comes home, or meet me sometime if he wants to talk.
Jeong In
Okay noona. I'll do that. Thank you for calling me, I'm glad I could be a friend.
Soohee
You are my friend Innie. Thank you to you as well. Goodnight.
Jeong In
Goodnight, then.
***CALL ENDED***
I starred outside, thinking for a moment.
If I were in Chan's place...I would definitely feel the same way he felt, but I never wanted to hurt him on purpose. Not like that.
Seeing me with another guy might've been to much for him... especially because we were like that before.
I stood up, ignoring my tears as they slip down my cheek.
I turned around and saw Han giving me a worried look.
Han Jisung
Soohee...
I suddenly started sobbing...Han walked towards me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.
Soohee
You- You're sweater will--
Han Jisung
I don't mind if you cry on my shoulders and get my sweaters wet with your tears...just let it out. I'm here.
We stayed like that for awhile. No talking, just the sound of the busy city, a beautiful sight of lights, and the shine of the moon upon us.