suicide note

_13

As I entered the front door, my mother, who I usually didn't see, was standing there.

As soon as I stepped into the house, I got slapped in the face.

Mate!

Because my skin is extremely sensitive, my face was red and had marks just like my mother's palm.

엄마

I've said many times that school and academy are different.

엄마

The academy takes money and raises your grades.

엄마

The school said that personality scores were included.

엄마

If you get a bad grade from your teacher and get a crappy performance score

엄마

What do you think Mom will do?

엄마

Let's think before we live, okay?

My mother, who would scold me by tapping my head with her finger and speaking ill of me, and then pretend to tell the teacher that she had taught me well.

The teacher who always nags mom about anything,

Because you are tormenting me so much,

It was so hard.

So I mustered up my courage and said something.

정예린

Mom, can I transfer schools?

정예린

I'm going to Jeonju. I'm going to Hwasan Middle School and Sangsan High School anyway.

엄마

Let me think about it,

정예린

yes ..

I think that was the first and last time my mother didn't frown while talking to me.

And we ended up moving to Jeonju.

Of course, I kept threatening to skip school and kept whining and getting scolded.

Still, Jeonju seemed better than before.

But that was a mistake.

Jeonju wasn't as good as I thought.

No, to be exact, my peers who live in Jeonju

Somehow, on the first day of transfer,

My eyes met with a familiar face.

문영현

정예린

Younghyun, a friend who hung out with Jiwon

The original plump, cute, and tearful Yeong-hyeon's appearance is gone.

It was nice to see Younghyun surrounded by his friends, tall and quite handsome, but it felt strange.

But I wanted something too big.

Younghyun was happy to see me, but

I flinched when I saw my legs.

The thought that came to my mind at that time was,

Oh, you've changed too

After making Jiwon sick

I want to live a normal life, but I am so selfish.

It was self-reproach and resentment.

I was so selfish, and looking back, I think I felt more resentment than self-reproach at that time.

That's no use, you idiot...