樸泰

The beginning

"Finally going Home"
This is what come to my mind sitting on the chair of the plane.
A weather as cold as this one can be annoying for other but for me it would summarize the mood of my life here in the United States.
The marks of the harsh winter is flowing slowly making the window cloudy like my thoughts and my life. 
Letting a sigh out I am now positive that going back to South Korea is the best decision at this time of my life .
Stress and excitement the two keywords to define the beginning of this long journey, I can feel it all over my body, the usual sign of nervousness reaching my fingers. 
As I am watching the employees preparing the takeoff my mind was trying to remember the poor 5 years that I have lived in South Korea which still seems to be difficult today.
 Living in America was tough but fruitful, It helped me define what I am today and how to handle my weird life. Even though weird would not be the right word to define me unorthodox maybe. 
Having a look at the seat next to me, a little smile comes to my face as I am remembering my success on finding a seat without other passengers to annoy me with their discussion. Not that I am a loner, I am just not used to hear human noise around me. 
Regarding human
"Tei"
My name, name that I am also not used to hear in the someone else's mouth.
In front of me standing one of the employee of the airplane company, at her voice can feel some distress and hesitation.
"What is the problem?"
I hate hesitation, I just hope that one day everyone would be more honest, time would be less wasted.
"I know that you especially wanted to have a seat for you alone during the flight but.....
"One more was added up"
At my words I see the face of the stewardess light it up. Arguing will not change anything, accepting quickly and adapting is a much better solution.
"It's okay"
I am used to it, I mean plans which don't go my way. 
Peace is for the lucky ones  
As I am putting the hood of my jacket in my head, I look  outside of the plane again trying to recall my lost memories.
As the time of the takeoff approaches the number of passengers coming on the plane rises, 
If the plane takeoff right now I would be grateful.
My thoughts can be quite selfish, thinking about others can be emotionally exhausting and stressful. Minding with others is not my forte and my favourite things to do. My relationship with others are quite special and complicated.
However Observing them can be interesting but don't help me to feel at ease with my peers.
A glance at the empty seat next to me discourage me to try any form of socialization for today.
Take a breath and close your eyes, tonight new city,new life, old same people.