Half past ten at night.
I fixed the final proof and uploaded it to the shared folder.
Assistant Manager Jeong Won sent me four characters over messenger: confirmed.
And then I closed my laptop.
"Good work. Head home."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won grabbed her bag and stood up.
I couldn't get up from my chair.
If not now, it would be Monday again.
Another morning greeting to the digits on the screen, another messenger ping.
"Assistant Manager. Can we talk for a second?"
Assistant Manager Jeong Won stopped walking.
She didn't turn around.
"If it's about work, let’s talk on Monday."
"It's not about work."
"Then we have nothing to talk about."
Her voice was calm.
Not angry, not annoyed.
It was just flat.
That hurt the most.
"Kim Yeoju, worry about your own work. I'll do mine too."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won started walking toward the door again.
Looking at her back, everything I'd been holding down for a month came surging up all at once.
"Senior."
It slipped out before I could stop it.
It was a title I'd never once called her by since my first day on the job.
Assistant Manager Jeong Won's steps stopped.
"Senior, why are you doing this to me?"
My voice trembled.
I meant to hold it in, but once it came out, it wouldn't stop.
"What did I do wrong? Why are you only so cold to me? If you don't like me anymore, just say so..."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won slowly turned around.
"It's not like that..."
"Then what is it?"
My vision blurred.
I hadn't meant to cry.
At the office, in front of my mentor.
A tear dropped, plop.
Once one tear fell, I couldn't stop the rest.
Assistant Manager Jeong Won froze completely.
The bag she was holding thudded to the floor.
She didn't even pick it up, just took a couple of steps toward me and stopped.
She started to reach out, then lowered her hand into the air.
"Wait. Wait."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won rummaged through her clothes and took a handkerchief out of her pants pocket.
It was a neatly folded sky-blue handkerchief.
"...Don't cry."
She held the handkerchief out to me.
Her fingertips were trembling a little.
"I'm sorry. Please, don't cry."
The voice that had never wavered for a month was a mess now.
I took the handkerchief and pressed it against my eyes.
It smelled like fabric softener.
The same smell I'd noticed the day she took a box of tea bags out of the pantry for me.
Only after I had taken a long breath could I speak.
This time, I made it to the end without breaking.
"Jongseong is not my boyfriend."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won's eyes widened.
"Jongseong has a girlfriend. Her name is Jiwon, and they've been dating for a year. That ring was Jiwon's one-year anniversary gift. Her fingers and mine are about the same size, so I tried it on for her and helped pick it out."
"..."
"The flowers that day, and the reservation, were all Jiwon's. I just got lunch out of it and went home."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won said nothing.
Then, very slowly, she covered her face with both hands.
"...Ah."
That was all the sound that leaked through her palms.
The office was quiet.
Only the hum of the fluorescent lights could be heard.
For a long while, Assistant Manager Jeong Won couldn't move her hands from her face.
"...I'm sorry."
A low voice came from behind her palms.
"I didn't know. I treated you like that, Kim Yeoju. I did."
I clutched the handkerchief tightly.
If I went home like this, Monday would probably come and everything would be like nothing had happened.
"If you're sorry,"
"...Yes?"
"Buy me a drink."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won lowered her hands from her face.
Her eyes were red.
"Now?"
"Now. It's Friday, isn't it?"
Assistant Manager Jeong Won looked at me for a moment, then nodded.
"...Let's go."
Then she picked up my bag for me.
She almost left her own bag on the floor, so I had to go back and get it for her.
*
There was a small bar in the alley behind the company.
The lights were low, and jazz played softly there.
Even though it was Friday night, there were only two tables of customers besides us.
We sat side by side at the bar counter.
Assistant Manager Jeong Won ordered whiskey, and I ordered a highball.
As soon as the bartender turned away, she added softly,
"Make it light."
"I can hear you just fine."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won coughed awkwardly.
"...It's my first time, that's all. Drinking with you, Kim Yeoju."
The drinks arrived.
Assistant Manager Jeong Won just stared at her glass for a while before speaking.
"I thought if someone has a boyfriend, I shouldn't get too close to her. So I drew a line."
Her fingers tightened around the glass.
"I didn't know it would feel that cold. I'm sorry. Really."
"Then what about the appendix table?"
Assistant Manager Jeong Won looked at me.
"You said you drew a line. The file info shows your name. 9:12 p.m."
"...That was just..."
"Just what?"
Assistant Manager Jeong Won took a sip of whiskey.
After a long pause, she answered.
"I couldn't leave it alone."
I fiddled with my highball glass.
Even though I'd asked for it light, my face quickly went hot.
So I summoned up my courage.
That thing I'd heard in the alley on the company dinner night.
"Assistant Manager. I heard you on the phone with Assistant Manager Park Seunghun that night."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won's hand stopped.
"I never said I was expecting anything. That's what you said."
"...You heard that?"
"I heard everything."
I looked straight at Assistant Manager Jeong Won's side profile.
"What were you expecting?"
Assistant Manager Jeong Won covered her face with both hands.
That made two times today.
Her ears, visible between her fingers, were bright red.
Until the jazz track ended and the next one began, Assistant Manager Jeong Won said nothing.
"...That was..."
She lowered her hands and looked at me.
Under the bar lights, it was the first time in a month that her eyes didn't avoid mine.
"It's not something to say when you've had a drink."
"You've only had one."
"Exactly. It's not something to say after one drink."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won set down her glass.
"When I'm sober, I'll tell you properly. I promise."
My heart thudded hard once.
I wasn't stupid enough not to know what that meant.
I lowered my head and downed the highball.
It wasn't light at all.
After that, we talked about trivial things.
How Jongseong and Jiwon met, how badly Jongseong had panicked while picking out the ring that day.
"But Assistant Manager, do you know how terrifying your face looked when you said 'congratulations' at the department store?"
"...Please erase that from your memory."
"Can't. I'm going to tease you about it for the rest of my life."
Assistant Manager Jeong Won laughed.
Just the corners of her mouth, and then her eyes too.
It was the first smile I'd seen in a month.
*
By the time we left the bar, it was almost midnight.
Assistant Manager Jeong Won raised her hand and hailed a taxi.
As I got into the back seat, I took out my phone through the open door and photographed the taxi's license plate.
Just like on the second week after I joined, on my first overtime night.
"Call me when you get there."
"Okay."
The taxi door closed.
Outside the window, Assistant Manager Jeong Won grew smaller and smaller.
Until the taxi turned the corner, she stood there in the same spot.
I looked down at the sky-blue handkerchief in my hand.
I'd forgotten to give it back.
No, maybe I hadn't meant to give it back at all.
The message I sent after getting home got a reply in one second.
Yes. Sleep well.
For the first time in a month.
