A beautiful, painless goodbye
🎵 Baek Yerin - Hall&Oates ((Please listen 😢))
I didn't know that would be the end.
That's the last nice thing you can say to me, and the affection you used to show me is now so familiar that I can hear it without having to look for it.
It's also a sweet word.
8 years of dating? It was so good. The more time I spent with that person, the more memories I have.
Because it piled up.
But after graduating from the same university, we each wanted to achieve our dreams.
It was something I desperately wanted.
That person was important to me, but the goal I wanted to achieve was also important.
Of course, that person was the same.
If we had the same goal, we could have spent more time together.
We had different goals in mind.
I wanted to do marketing, and Jimin just wanted to have a normal office job.
Honestly, I was a little surprised when I first heard it. Of course, because I graduated from the business school.
Not everyone has to have a special job, but it was a bit surprising.
But when I think about it, Jimin said I was going to management
I remembered that I followed him in too.
So, as long as you're okay, I don't care. I told you I could support you.
Our life, which we thought would be just so ordinary,
It started to go wrong little by little.
I keep missing meetings, Jimin keeps working overtime and getting up early.
I have a lot of work to do.
So we lost contact.
Until then, I don't think our relationship will become this distant.
Because I was confident.
But two weeks passed like that.
We contacted each other three times during those two weeks.
Did you eat, did you get some sleep, and are you not sick?
We only had these obligatory conversations.
Maybe I knew it from the beginning.
Eventually, the end will come for us, and the end will be in vain.
"You said you had a headache. Are you okay?"
"huh."
"I only ate a convenience store sandwich today. I've been practically starving lately.
"There's so much to prepare."
""Yeah. Go in and rest. You must be tired."
"···I'm feeling a bit off today, strangely."
"I'm just tired. Go to bed quickly and sleep. I'll talk to you tomorrow evening."
"···Do you have any questions for me?"
"I'm so curious about what you do while you're away from me.
But you're not here?"
"That's not it."
You just said it because you knew everything. I'm sorry, heroine.
"···That's because you didn't ask."
"How have you been? What have you eaten? Are you sick?"
"It's not hard to ask, and it's not the first time you've done it."
"I'm sorry. I guess I'm just so tired and worn out these days."
"···Me? I'm having a hard time too. I have a headache too.
Of course you're having a hard time too. I'm not ignoring you."
"But these days, when we talk on the phone or sit facing each other, we are clearly together
"I'm so lonely."
"···"
"I understand that you're both tired and busy, but this isn't it.
This isn't the Park Jimin I loved, nor is it the 7-year relationship I had."
I was already so tired that I missed those days even more.
The wounds had become much duller.
"···Just stop there. I'm sorry. So, please be more considerate today.
Let's calm down and talk again."
"···When? Another two weeks? How long do I have to wait?"
"I want to stop now. This isn't a relationship that should be between the two of us.
It just feels like I'm in a relationship by myself."
"···Just say one more thing there, really."
"···Let's stop now. Let's break up now, Jimin."
We were each other's first loves and first relationships, so we were awkward.
I think we spent enough time with each other.
So we broke up.
The reaction of that person who I thought would hug me right away if I said I was having a hard time
It was quite cold, unlike the person's affectionate atmosphere and warm words.
It was a cold winter night every time I passed by.
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After breaking up with you, everything became meaningless.
The tteokbokki restaurant in front of the school that I often went to with you, the bar we often went to,
Even the memory of me sitting down and crying my eyes out that night when we broke up has become meaningless.
I wish I had known it would turn out like this.
I shouldn't have made too many memories with that person, I should have liked him a little less.
Even now, when I walk down the street and hear the song you used to listen to often, I don't know
I'm starting to cry.
Too many memories have been planted.
The graffiti we left on the wall of the tteokbokki restaurant we often went to when we were in high school
It's probably still the same, but we've changed so much.
If I break up with you, I have to part with the precious memories I had with you.
Those memories were so precious to me back then that it was so frustrating.
But right now, if I say I've forgotten everything, it'd be a lie.
Everything is still the same for me.
Everyone has changed except me.Of course, Park Jimin too.
I heard through my friends that Park Jimin was promoted to team leader.
He said he even got a girlfriend.
When I heard that, strange emotions came over me.
- Oh, right. You know your high school reunion is tomorrow or the day after, right?
-···Huh? Oh, uh, uh. I know.
- ···Jimin is coming too.
If it's uncomfortable, I'll just tell them nicely.
- It's okay. It's all in the past. I'm okay.
Actually, none of it was okay. I was so nervous.
At first, I'll make you regret losing me, but it won't be comparable to before.
I thought about making it pretty and going, but it was all useless.
I just prepared appropriately and before I knew it, that day had come.
I was parking my friend's car in front of the store when I saw you.
It's still the same. It's been exactly two years since we broke up.
The coat and scarf you wore every winter were still the same.
After seeing that, I just sat there blankly for about five minutes.
I thought you were the same.
I think I just felt a sense of relief for some reason.
So I just went into the restaurant. As soon as I got there, our eyes met.
But contrary to my expectations, you, who only knew how to avoid my eyes,
He looked at me and smiled.
Maybe you had the same thoughts as me.
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It was a gathering where all my high school friends gathered.
With my friend's help, Jimin and I sat in the front, not next to each other.
I was able to avoid awkward positions by sitting diagonally.
"Kim Yeo-ju, how come you haven't contacted me since you graduated?
Should I ask the other guys about your life or death?
"Oh, sorry. I've been a bit busy. I haven't been in touch with Seojin for about four years."
"Are you two really busy? Park Jimin hasn't contacted me, and neither have you.
Hey, you two are both so busy, do you have time to go on a date?
As soon as my friend said that, everyone looked at me and Park Jimin.
I tapped the arm of the friend who said that.
Yeah, that's right. Unless you're still really close with me, we've broken up.
You may not know.
But, you drew a clear line.
"Hey, we broke up."
It's been a while since we broke up.Because you said that, it would be weird for me to pretend like nothing happened or to be embarrassed.
I was just smiling.
The atmosphere of just observing continued and slowly, one or two people
I started getting drunk and leaving the place.
I said I was going to the bathroom for a bit and came out to sober up a bit.
The night air grew colder as the evening grew darker.
So, because it was cold, I turned around to go back in.
You were there.
So I was just going to pass by, but one word from you caught me.
"It's gotten a lot colder."
how have you been doing?
I was afraid to talk to you, so I avoided you all day.
You walk so easily.
"···Yeah. I've been doing well."
"Wear this."
"Did you even bring my coat?"
"Yeah. It's been quite some time, but you're still outside, so I thought you might be cold."
"So, how have you been?"
"I've been doing well."
"Are you still busy?"
Two years ago, no, even just one year ago, if you were happy, I don't know why
I thought I was going to be annoyed, but today I feel fortunate.
Even after we broke up, we each adapted to life without each other in our own lives.
I don't think it's necessarily a sad thing to have done it.
"Is there anyone who can pick me up?"
"No. I'm just going to take the bus by myself."
"The car will be gone soon. I'll just give you a ride."
"No, it's okay. I can go alone."
"Okay. Anyway, once you say something, you won't listen right away."
Because of you, who grabbed my shoulder and took me to your car and put me in the passenger seat.
I just got burned. I still hate making other people uncomfortable.
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"···Do you remember where my house is?"
"Of course. It's been eight years."
"···You really don't seem to care."
"...It seems like that."
"Actually, I'm not that drunk right now. But I'm just a drunk person.
"Just think of it as nonsense and listen. I'm driving, so I won't bother you."
"···You can do it."
"I haven't adjusted for even a single day since we broke up.
Even now, when I see the road we used to take often, I feel strangely nostalgic and think of it."
"Sometimes, when a song you often listen to or a breakup song comes on, I cry."
"···"
"···I'm not saying we should go back."
"I just,
Tiring ringing ...
Sender 'Suyeon💍'
"You can take it. I can talk to you later."
"···"Just tell me the rest. I can call you back when I get home."
"Okay. Just answer the phone first. I'll wait for my girlfriend."
"I'll get it right away, so wait."
I'm looking at you coming down and answering the phone.
I thought a lot about us back then.
It looks good and pretty.
Maybe what I wanted to say to you was
You are my first love, and you are a good memory for a long time, and you helped me find the real me
Wasn't that a thank you?
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After we broke up, I spent exactly the same amount of time with you.
Just looking at the stores, alleys, cafes, and bars we went to together
I was in a bad mood all day that day.
And then I met this person.
"Do you want to eat tteokbokki? I usually eat tteokbokki when I'm in a good mood.
Team leader, you finished your project well today, so let's eat tteokbokki together."
He's someone who looks like you.
And then while I was talking to you, I got out of the car
The day I got the call.
- hello.
- It's not home yet. Is it still a bar?
- I thought you were going to call, so I'm on my way home. Are you home?
- That's right. You listen well.
I'm home. Who are you coming with?
"...Yeah. With a close friend."
Now that I know that I can only call you a friend, it finally feels real.
The relationship where we were each other's first love has ended.
Thank you. For being a good memory with my first love, without any scars, and beautifully.
Thank you for letting me finish.
((It's over))
Let's try to reveal some of Jjimni's unique TMI :)
When I write this short story, I tend to write it down in a notebook before transferring it to Fanflow.
Ah, as I'm writing this, the next story seems so drawn out and fun..
🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
So, I told this story to many people as a way to get advice.
Everyone
Throw the official serialization!
He shouted out ~
But I'm still thinking about it!
Anyway, I tried writing this because I was bored, but it took more time and effort than I thought.
I think it was poured out.
Thank you for liking the beautiful, pain-free breakup so far :) ❤