PJ (Hyunjin) short story collection

The sound of rain

The heavy sound of rain drumming against the living room balcony window makes a steady, regular rhythm. It's a cold, eerie downpour of an afternoon that makes me want to stay shut up inside forever. I’m sitting in an island counter chair, covered in Hyunjin’s big, soft gray hoodie, watching him finish up in the kitchen.

Across the table, Hyunjin is completely focused on pouring hot water into the dripper to brew coffee for the two of us. His unstyled, tousled hair falls naturally over his forehead, and the hoodie sleeves are rolled up to his elbows. His usual flashy idol image is completely gone, leaving behind an absurdly relaxed, gentle atmosphere.

Once the coffee is done, he goes all the way around the island counter and walks over to my side. Then he sits in the empty chair right next to me, completely closing the distance between us.

"Here," Hyunjin said softly as he placed the warm mug in my hand.

Our shoulders lightly brushed as the thick knit fabric touched. He took a sip of his coffee, then rested his chin on one hand and quietly watched me drink.

"Good?" he asked. It was that low, soft voice that sounded just a little sleep-lacking, the one that always made my heart pound.

"Perfect," I answered with a pretty smile, making sure my lips were easy to read under the light. Then I raised a hand and playfully signed,‘Park Hyunjin, a pretty great barista, huh?’

He let out a quiet, breathy laugh. It was that eye-smile I really loved, with the corners of his eyes folding into soft crescent moons. He lifted a hand to answer in sign language. Since we were sitting so close, his gesture was much smaller and slower than usual. ‘Just for you. I don’t make coffee for just anyone.’

"Liar," I teased out loud, lightly bumping his shoulder with mine.

But instead of pulling back, Hyunjin used the movement to lean even closer toward me. He set his coffee cup down on the table, then turned fully to face me. The lazy, easy afternoon air was instantly covered in a strange, dense tension.

When he reached out, it felt like the sound of the pouring rain outside was pushed all the way into the distance. His long fingers gently brushed back the hair that had fallen behind my ear, and his knuckles barely skimmed my cheekbone. His touch was so warm that a thin shiver rose where he touched me.

"I mean it," he whispered. His gaze lingered on my lips for a split second before locking onto the depths of my eyes. Then he quietly lowered his hand and covered mine, still holding the warm mug, with both of his big, warm hands. It felt like he was holding me in place so I couldn’t run.

I stared up at him blankly. I was scared the pounding vibration of my heart against my ribs might travel through the table and reach Hyunjin.

"I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately," Hyunjin continued in a painfully sincere, quiet confession. His hand around mine on top of the warm mug tightened gently. "On rainy days like this, when the whole world goes quiet... the only person I’d want beside me is you. I don’t want to just kill time with some friend when it rains anymore."

He tilted his face just a little closer to mine. A pretty, slightly nervous smile bloomed softly across his serious face.

"I want to be someone who can hold your hand like this every day," he whispered, looking straight into my eyes. I felt like my whole insides were being turned upside down by that unwavering sincerity. "I really like you. Not as a friend. Can I keep being by your side like this?"