I hadn't properly seen Park Wonbin for days.
Strictly speaking, I had.
We'd bumped into each other in the hallway, and brushed past each other in front of the lecture hall.
But somehow, whenever Wonbin saw me, he took a step back.
"Wonbin."
"...yes."
"Wait a second."
"I have class."
"But there are still ten minutes left?"
"..."
There was no answer.
He just lowered his head and walked past.
I stood there for a while.
What could have been so busy?
Or was I really that uncomfortable to him?
At first, I thought he was just embarrassed about getting drunk at MT.
But seeing him keep this up for a whole week made me think that wasn't it either.
*
In the end, I couldn't hold back anymore.
It was around evening when I spotted Wonbin coming out of the library.
He was walking alone with his earphones in.
Without hesitation, I followed him.
"Park Wonbin."
Wonbin stopped.
He took out his earphones and turned to look at me.
"...Noona."
"Are you avoiding me?"
"...No."
"You are avoiding me."
"I'm not avoiding you."
"Then why do you run away every time you see me lately?"
"..."
Wonbin didn't say anything.
Frustrated, I let out a sigh.
"Is this because you got drunk at MT?"
"...No."
"Then what?"
"It's nothing."
"How is someone who says it's nothing acting like this for a whole week?"
Wonbin's gaze fell to the ground.
After standing there in silence for a long time, Wonbin opened his mouth.
"...blind date."
"Huh?"
"You said you'd go on a blind date."
For a moment, I didn't understand what he meant.
"Ah."
The story I had with Minseok on the bus ride back from MT.
"So that's why?"
Wonbin didn't answer.
"I'm not going on a blind date."
"..."
"Minseok keeps telling me to go on one."
"Still..."
Wonbin gave a small laugh.
Somehow, that laugh sounded lonely.
"It doesn't matter, though."
"What doesn't?"
"Whoever Noona meets."
"Whoever Noona likes."
Wonbin paused for a moment.
Then he looked straight at me.
"...It's not like I can say anything about it."
That somehow made my heart feel strange.
"Wonbin."
"...Yes."
"Why are you really acting like this?"
I asked in a slightly softened voice.
"Did I do something wrong?"
"No."
"Then why are you doing this to me?"
Wonbin didn't say anything for a long time.
Then he laughed very quietly.
"...You didn't do anything wrong, Noona."
"Then?"
"...I'm the weird one."
"How so?"
Wonbin's fingertips trembled slightly.
"Because whenever I see Noona, I keep getting weird."
"..."
"I just want to talk to you for no reason."
"I want to be with you."
"And I hate it when you're with another guy."
I couldn't say anything.
As if he'd realized there was no turning back, Wonbin slowly went on.
"So I avoided you."
"Because if I stayed by your side, I thought I'd like you even more."
"But..."
Wonbin let out a short laugh.
"I think it's already too late."
My heart was beating strangely.
"I like you, Noona."
It was the first time I'd heard those words.
And yet, strangely, I wasn't that surprised.
Maybe I'd vaguely known it too.
Wonbin didn't avoid my gaze.
This time, he kept looking into my eyes to the end.
"You don't see me as a man, do you."
"..."
"I'm just a cute junior."
"You've been taking care of me from the very beginning."
"You asked if I'd eaten."
"You even helped me make friends."
"You remembered what I like."
Wonbin let out a small sigh.
"So it was even harder."
"You shouldn't be that nice to a guy you dislike."
"..."
"Because I keep getting my hopes up alone."
Only then did I understand.
Why Wonbin had been avoiding me.
Why he'd been so awkward.
Why he'd apologized over something as small as anything.
I couldn't say anything for a while.
To be honest.
I didn't hate it.
I liked Wonbin.
At first, I thought of him as a cute junior.
But at some point, whenever Wonbin wasn't at school, I found myself looking for him, and if he didn't contact me, I worried about him.
What Wonbin had said while drunk at MT had also stayed on my mind.
That said, I couldn't be sure it was love.
Carefully, I opened my mouth.
"Wonbin."
"...Yes."
"I don't hate you."
Wonbin's eyes widened a little.
"If anything, I like you."
"..."
"As I got closer to you, I started thinking you were a really good kid."
"So I hated it when you kept avoiding me."
Wonbin let out a very small breath.
But I still couldn't answer right away.
"But..."
"I don't know if I can say I like you yet."
"..."
"From the start, I didn't think of you as a guy."
Wonbin lowered his head for a moment.
Feeling bad for no reason, I added, "Could we keep spending a little more time together?"
"I want to figure out how I feel too."
A brief silence passed.
Then Wonbin slowly lifted his head.
"...Okay."
His voice was calmer than I expected.
"I'll wait."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
Then he smiled just a little.
"I just have to do well, right."
"..."
"I'll make you like me, Noona."
At that, I couldn't help laughing.
"Are you confident?"
Wonbin thought for a moment, then nodded.
"...No."
"But I'll try."
For the first time.
That day, Wonbin smiled properly at me.
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