Somehow in a relationship
W. Dingdongdang
“Do you not want your friends to find out about your video calls?”
Jeon Jungkook was just a quick-witted jerk. His eyes, glowing darkly with excitement at having discovered my weakness, reflected my own, utterly exhausted face. The contrast between his confident expression and my expression at being exposed was striking.
"… huh."
How long had it been since Jeon Jungkook's bold remark? Unlike earlier, his voice was utterly dejected and crawling as he answered. If a third party were to witness this scene, he'd be utterly humiliated. He couldn't have imagined seeing Jeon Jungkook like this. However, he decided it was better to just give in and go, rather than come out too strong and say something ridiculous, causing Jeon Jungkook to find out more.
Hearing my voice, which was completely drained, Jeon Jungkook raised an eyebrow and looked slightly flustered. Did he not know I would react like this?
“So, please don’t tell me. I beg you.”
I asked Jeon Jungkook as kindly and carefully as I could, careful not to offend him. In my 16 years of life, I've never felt so self-conscious. I glanced at Jeon Jungkook out of the corner of my eye, but he didn't seem to agree with me.
"You don't know, but I don't want anyone to find out about that. It's what you call a dark past. A completely dark, dark, dark past."
Perhaps my earnest desire had resonated. Jeon Jungkook's once cold expression shifted slightly. Had my words moved his heart, or perhaps they had become bait for him to manipulate me further? A faint smile slowly crept across his face.
“If you want to keep it a secret so badly, then keep it a secret.”
Jeon Jungkook, who spoke as if he was doing a favor and even munched on a Pepero stick that he found somewhere, was annoying to anyone who saw him, but right now, I couldn't be more grateful to him.
Strictly speaking, it hadn't been long since I'd seen Jeon Jungkook, but I'd been so aware of his every move that I'd unconsciously developed a kind of inner closeness. If only I could, I'd hug him tightly and scream out my thanks, but then I came to my senses. This was Jeon Jungkook, a ticking time bomb who knew my deadly secret.
“…But there’s no such thing as a free lunch in this world. There has to be a fair price for me to keep a secret, whether I keep it or not.”
Those were Jeon Jungkook's words, the very thing that had just poured a bucket of cold water on my mood. If I lost my temper, I'd be walking into the tiger's den, so I held it in.
“What do you want? Then?”
At my words, Jeon Jungkook hesitated for a moment, then opened his mouth, as if he'd already thought something through. He'd probably thought it through because he was confident I'd follow his request. It was truly astonishing that I'd actually acted on someone else's wishes.
"… my-"
"Do whatever you say? Okay, fine."
I don't know why I interrupted Jeon Jungkook. I thought about it a little more carefully and then slowly spoke up.As if he had been waiting for Jeon Jungkook to utter a complete sentence, he suddenly cut off his words.
“There is no softness.”
I don't know what Jeon Jungkook originally intended to say to me. I don't really want to know, but judging by the way he accepted it so readily and didn't lash out at me for interrupting him, I think he probably wanted something similar. He seemed thrilled that I was the one who said what he was too embarrassed to say himself. Somehow, I pushed aside the awkward feeling and made a silent agreement with Jeon Jungkook with a brief glance before leaving my room.
Until then, I couldn't have imagined what would happen at school the next day. I felt ashamed of myself for expecting the bad relationship with Jeon Jungkook to end.