"I have to go now to get to work..."
After plugging in my laptop and glancing at my busily ticking clock, I saw about an hour left until the meeting. Since this was supposed to be my first proper business meeting in a while, I couldn't approach it with my usual casual air. So, I quickly pulled out the neat dress and wrinkled suit I'd been keeping in storage. The employee I'd called had told me to dress comfortably, but... it was still a meeting, so I went in a hoodie and slacks. I debated between a suit and a dress, but I decided a suit would be too much, so I chose a plain dress that came down to my knees. I quickly finished getting ready and called a taxi to the office.
06
"hello..."
"Welcome! Please sit here."
I barely managed to enter the meeting room with about five minutes left. I was afraid the atmosphere would be too stiff, so I couldn't even say hello, but the staff seemed brighter and more level-headed than I expected. The staff member, who smiled and politely ushered me to my seat, sat down across from me, placed his hands neatly on the table, and stared at me intently. (He was also wearing a steady smile.)I guessI wasn't confident in my appearance at the moment, so the employee's gaze, staring intently at me as if he was searching, was bound to feel uncomfortable. When our eyes met, he smiled happily, as if he was really enjoying himself.
"I am so grateful to Mr. Lee Joo."
"...yes?"
"Oh, the advertising team is originally managed by the Vice President. He's so picky, but he said, 'Hey, after seeing Mr. Lee's advertisement, I should hire him right away!'"
"Vice President... right?"
"Yes! Normally, one advertisement takes about 4 months... but this time, it seems like it will end quickly."
Four months? Vice President? My bewildered heart slowly turned to anxiety. When I think of my ex-husband, Jeon Jungkook, I think of perfection. Perfection means him. I thought of him, agonizing over the vice president position during our marriage. It was Jeon Jungkook, who had stubbornly refused to take on the vice president role despite my father's insistence. And right. There was absolutely no way the current vice president was Jeon Jungkook. Perhaps stressed out by the vice president, his expression suddenly turned gloomy, unlike the employee before him, who had been blissfully smiling. Working with my ex-in-law's company was already unsettling enough, but meeting Jeon Jungkook here would be truly humiliating. It wasn't uncommon for the chairman's son to be in the lobby, but I was afraid I might run into him, having even come up the stairs to this meeting room.
I chewed my fingernails. I wondered if I should even ask this employee the vice president's name. The cap I was wearing, which didn't match my dress, was a godsend. I was sweating profusely from nervousness, but the employee glanced at my ringing watch, and, startled, pushed my chair aside and stood up.
"Oh, Mr. Vice President, you're almost there!"
"Vice President, what is your name..."
"Hello, Vice President!"
"Yes. Ms. An I-ju..."
It was a bolt from the blue. The vice president, who had taken off his suit coat and given it to his secretary upon entering the meeting room... Jeon Jungkook briefly bowed and greeted the employees before calling my name and seeming to look around. After seeing Jeon Jungkook's handsome face, I stood up from where I was sitting and bowed and straightened without saying a word. Jeon Jungkook, visible through the gap in his hat pulled down a little more, approached my seat, which was clearly a bit farther away from him, and pulled a business card out of his suit. He said this while handing it to me.
"I'm the vice president. You probably know my name."
"....."
What was so confident about Jeon Jungkook? His eyes were filled with conviction. He grabbed the armrest of the chair I was sitting in and turned it towards him, making it look like I was looking up at him. My ex-husband, who had put a business card in my left hand, looked at me for a moment before turning around. Jeon Jungkook snatched the leather jacket from the arm of the secretary who was flustered next to him and walked over to the center of the table with quite an air of pride. He tried to pretend that he was fine, but what happened in the car yesterday was embarrassing enough to keep him up all night... He looked at his flushed neck reflected on the sharp glass wall of the meeting room and tugged at his short hair. He then threw the crumpled business card onto the desk and tugged at it, saying that it was his own kind of revenge.
"Jeon Jungkook? This is the first time I've heard of him. Anyway, please take care of me, Vice President."
The vice president, his hands clasped loosely on the desk, let out a hollow laugh, as if he was completely taken aback. I tried not to let it show, but he must have sensed the tension between Jeon Jungkook and me, as he awkwardly let out an "ahaha..." and sat down. I stopped the childish act of glaring at him out of the corner of my eye when I noticed the employees laughing. I tossed the vice president's crumpled business card onto the table and quickly handed my laptop to the employee I had initially been talking to.
"This is... Ms. An I-ju, who will be in charge of the advertisement this time..."
“I guess things are urgent, so let’s skip the greetings.”
It was Jeon Jungkook who cut off the employee who was about to introduce himself after receiving the laptop. Anyway, he was still uninterested in working. The employee who was quite flustered by Jeon Jungkook's words, put my draft on the screen. Whether it was because he was satisfied or not, Jeon Jungkook turned his chair and looked at the draft carefully, then nodded absentmindedly.Then let's have a meeting first.The employees, who had been swallowing their saliva nervously, nodded reassuringly and repeatedly. I realized that Jeon Jungkook probably wasn't the type to work so briskly. Whether it was when they were dating or moving in together, Jeon Jungkook, who was always playful, was serious and focused on efficiency when working. And more than anything, he put his life on the line for his work. But I realized he also had a cautious side. It felt strange, like there was so much I hadn't known about him.
07
I had strange thoughts and all, so I completely cancelled it! Canceled everything! After a meeting that lasted about three hours, the conclusion I came to was that none of what I had initially heard from the employee was exaggerated. The conclusion of the advertisement that Jeon Jungkook wanted was firm.(I know his taste in pine trees(I did.)1 hourThis meeting, which was supposed to be a light one, stretched out to two hours simply because of Jeon Jungkook and I's differing opinions. I knew what style of advertising Jeon Jungkook wanted, but I thought it would be good to try different approaches, so I offered several suggestions. However, Jeon Jungkook kept nitpicking and cutting them all off. It was clear that he harbored ill intentions toward me.
The first thing I did after the meeting was apologize to the exhausted employees who were slumped over the table. As soon as my ex-husband and his secretary left the meeting room, they all took a deep breath and laid down on the table. Seeing them do this made me realize I'd been taking things too personally. So, although they were few in number, I gave them each a few chocolates I'd brought, apologized, and left the room for the second time. "Oh, I want to go home."
"ha..."
"Are you okay?"
"...?"
Jeon Jungkook, who had been standing behind the meeting room door, called my name as if he had been waiting for me to come out. It was getting annoying. Even though it had been yesterday, whenever I heard a muffled voice from behind, it was always expected, and of course it was Jeon Jungkook. Still, I didn't make a contemptuous expression every time I turned around just in case. Now, whenever I made eye contact with Jeon Jungkook's eyes, my face would turn red without warning. I remembered how I had sobbed and cried in the car. It was especially embarrassing because I knew Jeon Jungkook, who had been more pitiful than anyone else, even though I had just silently held the steering wheel back then, was more embarrassed than anyone else.
"...."
"Ah... Should I tell you? Vice President, Jeon Jungkook."
I spoke with a bright smile, unable to get angry. I hated Jeon Jungkook for embarrassing me all day. Not only was I nervous during the meeting, but thinking about how embarrassed I was because of it made me feel even more embarrassed. I almost overreacted to his words. Even when we were dating, Jeon Jungkook had no affection for work. That's why he would sometimes act cranky when I sneaked into his office. We cried a lot because of it, and we fought a lot. Of course, Jeon Jungkook was always the one who apologized. For some reason, memories of the past came flooding back, and my eyes felt hot.
"Do you have any ill feelings toward me?"
"....you Lee Joo,"
"Why do you keep making my life miserable... Do you have to say things like that?"
The reason I was standing in front of him with my face bright red was because I cried in front of Jeon Jungkook yesterday, but I didn't even think about holding back my tears because I blurted out words to him in a rapid-fire manner and immediately sat down with my legs bent. My dress slightly touching the floor felt incredibly pitiful. Jeon Jungkook followed me as I sat down and bent my knees to look at my face. Do you want to make me feel embarrassed even at times like this? You're really going too far. Sob, sob. I covered my eyes with my right arm to wipe away the tears that were falling, but I didn't really know why tears were coming down when I didn't feel particularly sad. But I was in a situation where I just had to cry anyway.
"Don't cry. Were you upset? I'm sorry."
I was crying so hard that my nose was squeaking, and he seemed to feel pity for me, so he stroked my head warmly and spoke to me in a soft voice. My tears had almost stopped, but at the wrong time, I felt resentful towards the affectionate Jeon Jungkook, and tears welled up again. I whined for quite a while, grumbling and pouring out my heart about things that had nothing to do with Jeon Jungkook, but Jeon Jungkook answered every single thing without fail and hugged me, as if he would listen to me. At my ex-in-laws' company, I was hugging someone while crying. It could be controversial that that someone was my ex-husband..., After I realized where I was very late, my tears stopped and I became anxious.
"I guess everyone cried."
"...."
"You don't have to be anxious. Everyone will be at the restaurant for dinner anyway."
"I see..."
After I answered, Jeon Jungkook offered to drive me home. Sometimes, Jeon Jungkook is really affectionate, even when it's not the right time. He still is. The reason I fell for him in the first place was solely because of his affection. Even now, you can tell how affectionate he is just by looking at my actions and what I'm thinking, and what makes me anxious, faster than I am. It's been almost a year since we broke up, and just seeing why he told me everything about me shows how comfortable we are when we're together. Affection is scarier than love.
Jeon Jungkook, who had already noticed my reluctance to take the elevator, guided me to the emergency stairs. As if he were a police officer lurking, I cautiously boarded Jeon Jungkook's car in the underground parking lot, and felt relieved. I let go of my worries and wiped away the remaining tear stains.
"Your eyes are red."
"...I know. There's no need to mention it."
"I'm sorry for being cold to you."
I don't know how many times this apology has come, but whenever the words "sorry" burst out of his mouth, my heart strangely ached. Right now, we're in a relationship where I shouldn't care if you're cold to me, and you shouldn't have to comfort me if I cry in front of you... Why does my heart still break so much whenever you say bad things to me and treat me coldly? The circumstances of Jeon Jungkook's apology were also strange. After all, the criticism I directed at him for a year was just regret. After thinking that if this regret was expressed any longer, I could end up as an even worse woman, I took my dry, clenched lips off and spoke to him in a rather confident voice.
"We're not on good terms right now, so I don't think that's something you should feel sorry about."
"..."
"...Let's go home."
From Jeon Jungkook's perspective, I was incredibly selfish. If you asked me if I'd ever cried and cried while saying, "Why are you saying bad things to me and acting so embarrassing?", I would have replied, "When?" Even I could see that I was really bad right now. It was heartbreaking to see Jeon Jungkook maintaining a heavy silence, unlike when he would playfully apologize to me.
08
"Thanks for taking me today. From now on, I'll just... take taxis. Let's just end this today."
"It's such a nice car, I'll drive it myself."
"You can do that to the women who like it."
I tapped my password and blurted out a halfhearted answer. Arriving in front of my studio apartment in Jeon Jungkook's car was no different than yesterday, but one difference was that Jeon Jungkook walked me to the front door. It was getting dark quickly, so when he said he'd walk me to the front door, I was skeptical and objected. But I couldn't overcome Jeon Jungkook, who insisted, making excuses like his laptop was too heavy and the neighborhood he lived in being the scariest these days. Jeon Jungkook held my bag until I punched in my password. The front door opened and we exchanged bags. Jeon Jungkook hesitated after hearing my answer, then quickly grabbed the automatic door that was about to close with his hand. Then he said.
"I can't do it without you. I can't meet you."
If my heart started pounding like crazy, would that be a problem? He looked pitiful, but also good, as he propped the door with his body and barely held onto the hem of my clothes. After all, Jeon Jungkook, whom I hadn't seen in a year, was, in a word, truly... dangerous. The way my feelings for him swelled again in an instant, to the point where I wondered when I had ever hated him... Jeon Jungkook was the one who endlessly reminded me that I hadn't completely resolved him.
"Jungkook."
"...Lee Joo-ya,"
"We're divorced... We're not even separated."
"...Right. That's right."
Perhaps my feelings for him are not lingering love, but those eight years of affection. When I met his tightly bitten lips and tearful eyes, the words I had tried to say coldly strangely did not come out. I have always been such a weak woman to Jeon Jungkook. I clenched my fists and pulled hard at the hem of my skirt. We are divorced. This was something I never wanted to mention between him and me, but now that I said it myself, I regretted it, regretted it... Regret. It probably wasn't a good experience for either Jeon Jungkook or me.I'm sorry, I said something wrong.It was Jeon Jungkook who released the sleeve I had been desperately clutching. This wasn't the kind of apology I wanted...
"I'll make sure there are no inconveniences in the future."
"..."
"Still... it's dangerous to walk around late at night. Think of me as a knight, and call me whenever you need me."
"that...,"
"I can listen to this much."
As expected, he seemed to have sensed my intention to reject him. Soon, Jeon Jungkook confirmed my nod and then straightened my messy hair. When I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, he turned away without a second thought. Ah... something felt wrong. I thought we were just casual business partners, but strangely, I felt very distant from him. The feeling of self-loathing was overwhelming. From the moment I got home until I fell asleep, Jeon Jungkook's shy smile lingered in my mind, and I couldn't do anything. I couldn't help it.
★
hello!
Long time no see...? ㅋㅋㅠ
Episode 3I'll bring it right back!
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