We decided not to cross the line.

Episode 105. Timing

"Julian..."





I didn’t know how, or what I was supposed to say.

I couldn’t think of anything.

Should I honestly say I’d run into Mr. Hoonji again,

or make up some other excuse?

My head was in such a mess.





Seeing me unable to say a word,

Julian went on.





"I know.
 
 It must have been so sudden, so upsetting...

 But I also realized that my feelings were too big

 to just let go without ever telling you.

 No matter what answer you give,

 I’m going to make my own effort

 so I won’t regret it later."




His expression looked resolute.




"Still, how could you just come here without contacting me...?"





"Ah... sorry.

 I thought you might not answer if I contacted you."


"Actually...

 I was worried you might have gone back to Korea.

 I worried a lot.

 If that had happened, I was going to accept that

 our fate had ended there.

 When Miguel said you were still here,

 you have no idea how happy I was."





"Julian.

 I... I don’t want to start our relationship over."





"I understand how you feel.

 Still, I don’t want to give up that easily.

 I’ve confessed my feelings today, so that’s enough."





"You came all this way just to say that?

 I don’t want you getting hurt and disappointed any more.

 Just stop here. Julian..."





"I came all this way

 because I thought you’d say that."





"Julian.

 There’s a timing to life, they say.

 We’re... too late..."





"Are you... seeing someone else?"





'Do I need to talk about Hoonji...?

 He knows Hoonji’s an actor, too,

 but is it okay to tell him?'




"Whether you’re seeing someone else or not,

 it doesn’t matter.

 I have no intention of starting over with Julian."





"I know.

 Maybe I’m being greedy.

 Still... can’t you just watch over me?

 Even that... won’t you do that?"





"Ha... Julian..."

 You’re making this too hard for me."





I had no idea how I was supposed to stop him.

"I’ll get up first.





 I’m sorry I can’t accept your feelings.

 Take care getting home."

"I’ll be at the hotel I always stay at





 when I come here this weekend."

I met his earnest gaze.




Even though I didn’t love him,

my heart hurt unbearably, and felt heavy.

Leaving his words behind,

 



I left the cafe and was walking home.

I could see Hoonji in the distance.





Whether he had been waiting for me or not,

he stood there just as he was.

I wanted to smile when I saw him, but




the smile wouldn’t come.

He was just looking at me, too, with worried eyes.




"Did it go well?"

"Hoonji... can you hold me for a bit?





 I feel so awful."




He quietly held me.

At that moment, the tears I’d been holding back broke free.




"He said he’d go to the hotel Julian always stays at.

 That person who can’t even ask me to come... I feel kind of sorry for him, too.




 It hurts so much."

"What?"
 
Hoonji was startled and





pulled me out of his arms.




"Why is he going to the hotel?

 Did he come here to ask to start over?"





 "I’ll go instead."

"No.


 Then he’ll get hurt even more.





 Don’t do that."

"You want me to just stay like this?"

"Even if it takes time, I’ll try to convince him.




 Hoonji, don’t step in. Please..."




"Why do we always end up hurting someone?"