Dangerous Investigation Diary

Ep. 56 ° One day in 2003 (2)

As I walked to the office with the ice pack on my cheek, a breaking news report was on TV. Five people were killed by an illegal organization, over thirty were injured, and dozens were victims of arson and drug use. The news made me feel weak.

I could see why my seniors had been so earnest in asking me to do this. If I couldn't catch them, the damage would soon spread nationwide, and the police force could fall prey to them. I wonder if the disbandment of one violent crimes unit gave criminals more confidence to run wild...

박성진 [33]

"Hey... when are they going to get caught?"

박성진 [33]

"The strong team alone is lacking manpower..."

박성진 [33]

"Oh, sorry."

하여주 [29]

"...It's okay. That's not wrong, is it?"

As I answered with a bitter smile, Inspector Park immediately turned off the television. When the violent crimes unit was mentioned, one person came to mind... Patrolman Jeon. He was the only one of the team members who remained in the violent crimes unit. I wonder what the situation there is like. It's probably like thin ice.

박성진 [33]

"Oh, by the way, the counseling psychology team requested an interview earlier."

하여주 [29]

"...The counseling psychology team?"

One of the teams that has the least interaction with the police administration team is the counseling psychology team. Unlike the police administration team, which spends all day looking at documents, the counseling psychology team, which deals with more than five or six people a day, has no way of having any contact with them. But then suddenly, an interview...

박성진 [33]

"Team 2, Sergeant Kim Tae-hyung, Team 3, Sergeant Park Jimin."

박성진 [33]

"We know each other, right?"

하여주 [29]

".....yes."

Even if you say no here, it’s only a matter of time before you can find out that you were on the same team if you look through the work records, and there’s no way Superintendent Park wouldn’t know that. When I told him that I knew the truth, Superintendent Park nodded and continued talking.

박성진 [33]

"See... when it all subsides, go."

박성진 [33]

"I'll contact you."

하여주 [29]

"...No. I think it would be better if we didn't meet."

박성진 [33]

"I think it would be better if we met."

하여주 [29]

"...What's the point of meeting? We'll just fight again."

박성진 [33]

"Are you really sure you won't be shaken after hearing that?"

No, I wasn't sure. If time were to delay any longer, this country would become their den, and then there would be no turning back. The immediate choice to avoid it for my own convenience could have resulted in me giving up the police job I had dreamed of my whole life.

박성진 [33]

"I'm giving you one last chance."

박성진 [33]

"If you don't go to this interview, I will consider it meaningless and will not allow you to do any other work."

박성진 [33]

"Choose, you yourself."

Even if I choose to stay here, will I be able to live with my sanity? If I feel like arresting them right away, should I jump into another big incident? This time, it's on a scale that could really kill me, so is this the right choice?

하여주 [29]

"...I will interview you."

박성진 [33]

"...Okay. I'll contact you."

03:39 PM

박성진 [33]

"I'll have an interview around 4 o'clock and then I'll leave work right away."

하여주 [29]

"thank you."

I think it's an instinct that people who are in a certain field and then leave it struggle with that memory for the rest of their lives. I know what's going to happen and I just go for it... I've really changed a lot.

When the appointed time came and I went to the interview location, Police Officer Park and Police Officer Kim were already there waiting for me. The intensity of the counseling psychology team’s work was no joke, so the two of them looked even more haggard than when they were in the violent crimes team. Well, there aren’t any seniors who look normal. Including me.

박지민 [30]

"It's been a while."

김태형 [30]

"how have you been doing?"

하여주 [29]

"Yeah, well, kind of..."

하여주 [29]

"...Why did you call me?"

김태형 [30]

"...Did you see the news?"

하여주 [29]

"News about illegal organization damage?"

박지민 [30]

"I know right."

박지민 [30]

"We need the manpower to suppress that organization."

박지민 [30]

"As you can see, the size of the organization is large, and the civilian damage is also large."

박지민 [30]

"Even though we mobilized the entire force, it didn't calm down."

김태형 [30]

"There are already several people in critical condition and injured."

김태형 [30]

"Among them... I include the former police officer."

김태형 [30]

"So, of course, the West is trying to gather us together."

김태형 [30]

"You must have seen the email too."

하여주 [29]

"...I saw it."

김태형 [30]

"It seems like the seniors have already made up their minds..."

김태형 [30]

"I was curious to know what you think."

하여주 [29]

"...I don't know."

하여주 [29]

"Honestly, I'm scared."

하여주 [29]

"I didn't know that a day could pass so peacefully while working for the police administration team..."

하여주 [29]

"Knowing that, should I just settle for staying safe in the West?"

하여주 [29]

"I wonder if it's really right to pretend not to know when you know all the risks and worst-case scenarios..."

하여주 [29]

"I really don't know."

박지민 [30]

"...Yeah. You must be confused too."

박지민 [30]

"Call me whenever you make up your mind."

박지민 [30]

"They're already forcing us to gather from above..."

박지민 [30]

"If you say no, I'll do whatever it takes to make sure you don't get involved."

하여주 [29]

"...Thank you. I'll think about it."

Even though I said I had poisoned my heart, it was a process that would collapse immediately if I touched it even a little. It was hard, but happy memories continued to torment me. It might have been better to block it out completely, like Inspector Park said. What would be better for me?

As I entered the house with mixed emotions, I made eye contact with the man sitting on the sofa with dark circles under his eyes. It's already been a year since I started having a cold war with the man.

The day before Team 1 was disbanded, I was rushed to the emergency room with gastritis after vomiting, and then I heard the news of the disbandment. I cried and argued for days while getting IVs, but it wasn't accepted. From then until now, we haven't been able to go back to how we were before.

It's been a while since I saw him come home from work and go straight to his room to sit on the sofa like that. I was trying to avoid that man's gaze by putting my feet on the first step of the stairs to go into his room.

윤도운 [36]

"...please do it."

The old man's soft voice stopped me in my tracks, and as I got closer to him, I could smell the strong smell of alcohol. As he didn't usually drink much, I frowned, and the old man sprayed a lot of the perfume that was on the nightstand.

윤도운 [36]

"...Do you feel like talking now?"

하여주 [29]

".....no."

윤도운 [36]

"Hey, do it."

하여주 [29]

"You're trying to talk to me so that I can feel at ease, sir."

윤도운 [36]

"what?"

하여주 [29]

"I'm still stuck in that place... I can't turn back."

하여주 [29]

"Sir, I can see that you have no intention of apologizing to me, and you don't seem to be sorry, so just...!"

윤도운 [36]

"Why should I be sorry?"

윤도운 [36]

"It's also a fact that one of your seniors strangled you."

윤도운 [36]

"For whatever reason, your team leader said you would be disciplined."

윤도운 [36]

"Is it a problem that the punishment is team disbandment?"

하여주 [29]

"Of course it's a problem."

하여주 [29]

"There is no such case anywhere..."

윤도운 [36]

"It's true that your punishment was a bit harsh because you were associated with high-ranking officials."

윤도운 [36]

"Your team has been in that state for over a month, so you can just leave it like that?"

윤도운 [36]

"What's the point of having good performance?"

윤도운 [36]

"What kind of police are they when they can't tell the difference between public and private affairs and interfere with work by bringing in personal circumstances..."

하여주 [29]

"No one ever felt bothered."

하여주 [29]

"Rather, I consoled him and told him it was okay."

윤도운 [36]

"I wonder if that's true."

The documents that the old man scattered on the table with a hollow laugh were team member evaluation reports. A year ago, before the disbandment of Team 1. Although it was a report written every time a quarter changed, this report was written by each person in their own hands when the team atmosphere was tense.

Even though it was a team, it was absolutely top secret, so I could never see my teammate's report. It was my first time seeing my seniors' report. But why does the old man have this?

하여주 [29]

"...What is this."

하여주 [29]

"This is our team report. Why are you here...!"

윤도운 [36]

"To be exact, it's not your team, it's my old team."

윤도운 [36]

"This is the document that my superiors gave to my father and me right before the disbandment disciplinary action."

윤도운 [36]

"If the team member evaluation report is like this, will you maintain the team?"

윤도운 [36]

"Do you think I didn't try hard?"

윤도운 [36]

"I held on until the end because I thought I wouldn't be able to see your face if it really broke up."

윤도운 [36]

"But... look at how those great seniors wrote it."

윤도운 [36]

"You're really a senior, you know..."

윤도운 [36]

"Is this the team you were trying to protect?"

I didn't have the confidence to face the man who was speaking desperately in a trembling voice, so I just looked at the reports scattered on the table, and the man went into his room. Only then did I slowly sit down on the sofa and pick up the reports one by one and read them.

First of all, Chief Kim... As expected, as the team leader, he felt the seriousness of the situation and had a sense of responsibility.

As expected of Chief Min, the report was written concisely and boldly. There were many traces of writing and erasing. It seemed like he had put a lot of thought into it before writing the second sentence.

Officer Jeong... He was saying that the beginning of this was all his fault. I'm sure that's not necessarily the case.

It seems that Sergeant Kim was most shocked by the disruption to his work. After all, he is in charge of work that must be done quickly and cleanly...

And... the most shocking thing written was by Police Officer Park. Judging from the fact that he singled out a specific person and talked about the cause, his hatred seemed to be strong, and there were even gossip about me that wasn't gossip written about me. And even the talk about disbandment... I guess I'll have to pretend I didn't see that last sentence.

Although Chief Kim's report seemed to be written in the most refined manner, the message written in it was accurate. I thought that even Chief Kim, who was so bright, might have been tired of this whole situation.

The report by former police officer seems to be written most positively. This one seems to have more hatred towards this officer.

And lastly... the report I wrote. I felt sorry for myself back then, when I had drawn hearts without knowing what would happen in the future, so I closed the report and stopped looking at it.

Each person had a different opinion on the situation, but the common opinion was, 'Teamwork is the worst.' What did I believe so strongly at that time that I thought it would be resolved? Other than subtly asking myself back then, there was nothing I could do now.

That fact was so frustrating that I crumpled up the whole report in a fit of rage, wiped away my tears, and went into my room. It was the first conversation I had with my uncle in a year, but I had ruined it in a bad way, and it was the worst day of my life because I learned things I wish I had never known.

I went into the room, changed my clothes, and lay down. I turned off the lights and tried to fall asleep, which wouldn't come. A cheerful ringtone that didn't fit in the quiet and dark room rang, and the caller was... I knew it right away even though it wasn't a saved number. It was a former police officer.

하여주 [29]

- "...hello?"

I put the phone on and held it to my ear, but I couldn't hear anything, so I tried to say something, but I only heard breathing and no answer. After about a minute, I heard the voice of the former officer on the phone.

전정국 [28]

- ".....Sister."

하여주 [29]

- "...uh?"

전정국 [28]

- "...Sister, I got a call too."

하여주 [29]

- "...huh."

전정국 [28]

- "Sister... what do you want to do?"

Before I could even use formal speech, I heard the comfortable title of "noona" and started talking informally. At first, it was an unfamiliar title, but that one word really put me at ease. However, I couldn't respond right away to the last word.

전정국 [28]

- "...Sorry. I'm too difficult..."

전정국 [28]

- "I'll hang up now. Good night."

하여주 [29]

- "wait for a sec..."

하여주 [29]

- "You, what do you want to do?"

전정국 [28]

- "...The Chief of Police said to decide by this week."

전정국 [28]

- "I'm going to think about it some more until then."

하여주 [29]

- "...I see."

하여주 [29]

- "If we get back together... and the ending is good."

하여주 [29]

- "Can we get along well again like we used to?"

전정국 [28]

- "...Well, it's a case where I really have to risk my life."

전정국 [28]

- "I... still don't know why we had to break up."

전정국 [28]

- "I still haven't adapted to Team 2..."

전정국 [28]

- "Why are the 3rd strong team that committed a bigger crime than us doing well after completing their disciplinary action?"

I couldn't say anything and just froze as Jeongguk's voice trembled, whether he was crying or angry. That's right. The third team, which ranked last in performance, was doing well, but why did we feel like we were being used like this... Doing a good job felt like a sin and choked me.

하여주 [29]

- "...If you work hard, you will be saved someday."

하여주 [29]

- "I'm going to sleep now. I'm a little tired."

전정국 [28]

- "Okay... Go to sleep. Sorry."

전정국 [28]

- "Think about it carefully."

전정국 [28]

- "Someday... I'll see you again. Then with a smile."

하여주 [29]

- "...Okay. You too, sleep well."

The phone call ended like that, and I leaned my head against the wall helplessly. The former officer must have been injured, too, so what must it be like to call me? If I were to pass out like this and never see tomorrow, would it be better to breathe that way? Every day was hard to live. Today, I spent the night crying silently.

By any chance... I'm worried that it might be slow progress 🥺 I think there's probably one more episode like this left, and things will progress from then! It's not easy to pioneer season 2... 🥲 Please enjoy and wait ☺️ Thank you for watching today too 💓

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