"I hope today is the last day"

04. Pure dreams, vague wishes

"I hope today is the last day"

Episode 4. Pure Dreams, Vague Wishes

🍈10k Hours (Feat. Nas) - Jhene Aiko

++ I think this song will fit the mood of this episode :-)

한사라

…….

I couldn't believe it. Who was standing before me? Why was he here? Why did he pretend to know me? How did he find me?

While everything was still questionable, he came over to me as I stood up, knelt down on the floor without hesitation, and retied my shoelaces.

As I was looking down at him as if possessed by something, at some point he, who had tied both of my shoelaces, was looking up at me.

김태형

You have to tie it like this_

After saying that, he got up and said to me,

김태형

Long time no see. How have you been?

…I couldn't bring myself to say anything. My mind just went blank.

I smiled crookedly without saying anything, avoided his gaze as much as possible, and stared at the floor.

I was just trying to avoid this place… but it was he who grabbed my wrist first.

김태형

It's a bit disappointing if you've already forgotten me.

He already knows.

He knows all too well that I still haven't forgotten him. That's why he'll shake me up like he always has.

"Yeah, it's been a while." That was all I could muster after making a big decision. I was hesitant to engage in any conversation with him.

To go back to our first meeting, we have to go back quite a long time.

Nine years ago, when I was eighteen.

Just like any other day, as soon as class ended, I rushed down to the cafeteria with my friends. And since they were serving my favorite cheese hotdog, I didn't even look back.

At the age when eating was everything, I was so busy. I pushed past my friends, who were shouting my name to stop me, afraid I'd fall, and quickly arrived at the cafeteria. But when I saw only a few people there, I looked back at the path I'd taken.

I think I can hear my friends talking from up there on the stairs… but if I keep going like this, I'm going to lose my turn to the other kids. I ran all the way here to get first place.

한사라

Hey-!!! Why don't you guys come down quickly?!?

So, out of the blue, I yelled at the front. One of the teachers nearby was startled… The footsteps gradually got faster, as if they heard me.

"Ah haha, Hansara, since when have you been here-? You're really fast."

한사라

Okay, okay, come quickly.

I watched the three of them walk alongside me, keeping pace, as I walked backwards. I urged them, saying they didn't have time, and only then did they run back, so I ran backwards without even looking back.

But… the expressions on the faces of the kids looking at me gradually hardened. By the time I realized it, it was already too late.

Oh, really, that's what happened when I heard that sound. I felt like my back had bumped into someone's, so I turned around in a hurry.

한사라

…I’m really sorry. Are you okay? You’re not hurt…

Even when I think about it, it was almost like he was slamming his body into me… I think it would hurt even if he was a boy.

The guy, who I assumed was a lot bigger than me, turned around and spoke at the same time as me. It was as if he was the only one in slow motion at the time, honestly.

김태형

Sorry, I didn't see it. Are you okay?

I think I frequently used that time (when I fell in love at first sight) as an excuse to visit him. I actually liked him, but I hid my feelings and focused on becoming close to him.

At that time, I thought it would be enough to just remain friends.

It had been nearly five years since I'd seen his face. His face, perhaps fading now, had appeared in my dreams countless times, so it felt as familiar as if I'd seen it yesterday.

한사라

… How long have you been in Korea?

김태형

It's been a while. Since last week, I think.

When I came to, we were sitting side by side on a bench. It was him who handed me a warm can of coffee he'd gotten from a vending machine.

It was a night when the white snowflakes fluttering against the dark sky sparkled especially brightly after the snow had completely fallen.

The bright lights illuminating the city remained, and while simple conversations passed between people, we remained conscious of each other without saying a word.

You may have once considered me just another common friend, but to me, you were anything but common.

But since you don't know that, you must have been able to talk to me so easily, unlike me who is having a hard time.

As I fiddled with the canned coffee you offered me, all sorts of thoughts raced through my mind. Fresh from the vending machine, the warmth enveloped my hand, and while it felt good, the warmth that soon faded reminded me of the warmth we shared.

As the remaining warmth in the can began to cool, I carefully opened the lid and brought it to my lips. The warm drink on this cold night instantly thawed my frozen body.

한사라

Well then, I guess I'll stay in Korea for a while.

김태형

Okay, now I've done everything I had to do.

"All I have to do is set up a shop here," he said in a carefree tone, flashing a pleasant smile as he downed the rest of his coffee.

Yes, he said that he, the object of my unrequited love who once stole my heart, had a dream since he was young.

Everyone has dreamed of being a rich, unemployed person, or winning the lottery... nothing more than becoming someone who gives fragrance.

I remember being taken aback at first. "What... a gift?" he asked. But his reply was full of conviction: to study to become a perfumer and open his own workshop.

I think he said that he wanted to become famous and donate all of his earnings to children.

He had been studying steering professionally in a foreign country for five years, and it seemed like his resolve hadn't changed even after five years.

한사라

You must be busy, there's a lot to figure out.

These days, land and building prices are skyrocketing. It's hard to even buy a house of my own. He used to laugh so hard he'd turn his head and stare at me.

"I have more than enough money." He smiled at me, his expression flirting, and I patted him on the shoulder. "You're bragging to me right now."

When he smiled, I found myself smiling too. Taking advantage of that moment, he said...

김태형

I'm going to be busy soon, so you could help me out a bit.

He leaned closer to me and spoke, as if he had been hoping I would help him in the first place.

But… I hope this is the last time I see you.

Even if it's to protect my pure heart from the past, and even if it's to confirm that my first love is safe now, so that I can completely forget about you.

I hoped today would be the last.

I wish I could let you go from today.

++ No, Saraya... You guys are just getting started ( •︠ˍ•︡ )

++ No, you guys. But. The visuals. Why the hell. Can't I make a gif of it🤦🏻‍♀️? (Deep sigh)🤦🏻‍♀️ Hit my forehead. Really. I want to put a gif in it. That way I can get more immersed.