Hoseok
July 25, Year 22
I ran into YoonGi on my way to the living room.
I was going to the practice room after leaving the hospital.
Without realizing it, I stopped. What would I be capable of doing?
There? My ankle had worsened. The soft cast had
It was replaced with a real plaster cast. The doctor scolded me.
"You shouldn't strain your ankle." But I couldn't sit down.
while working at the burger joint. Also
It happened a lot in the practice room. "You have to have
Be very careful with your ankle. It's been injured before and
It could be permanently damaged unless it has a
"Special care." The doctor repeated this over and over.
I entered the main road that leads to my house.
on my crutches. I hadn't gone home so early. No
I had skipped training for no particular reason.
I came face to face with YoonGi. He was drunk and
staggering across a pedestrian crossing. He didn't recognize me.
when he tripped over me.
I turned my head and fixed my eyes on the sign.
"Walking." Two days after my visit to Jungkook in
The hospital, he had gone to YoonGi's studio. He didn't
He answered my call, so I just went
directly to his workroom. It must have been because of the
tomorrow because it was before going to Two Star Burger. I called
at the door, but no one answered. The faint sound of the
Music was flowing through the door. I thought about calling him again.
But I gave up. I kicked the door.
I'd known YoonGi since high school. I knew how...
His mother had died, how her death had affected him.
death and how he had fought afterwards. I tried to be a
A comforting and reliable friend for him. I laughed at his
harsh words and I took it everywhere even though
He thought I was irritating. But he didn't care about us.
We thought that at least Jungkook should be different.
He surely knew what it meant to him. He already knew.
about Jungkook's accident through Jimin. But
He didn't come to the hospital. What's worse, a woman who said
Being her musical partner came about unexpectedly.
several days ago. She told me she had found me.
After asking everyone, she said she couldn't.
contact him.
The "Walk" sign turned green. I started to
I crossed the pedestrian crossing, staggering. I looked towards
I backed away as I doubled my steps. I didn't want to help him.
But I couldn't help it. YoonGi lay in the street in front of
A car selling accessories. The vendor yelled at him.
while pedestrians frowned.
"When are you going to stop doing this?" He looked at me without...
Understand. "Do you think you're the only one going through this?"
Through difficult times? Do you think I put on a smile?
in front of others because my life is rosy and
Brilliant? Tell me. Why are you so upset? All the
The world knows you're good at music, and everyone...
They put up with it willingly, even when you act like that. Yes,
You must be feeling pain since your mother died. I know. But
You can't go on like this forever. Aren't you...
Composing music? Can you live without that? Haven't youHave you ever been happy, even just once, because of music? Why?
Didn't you go to see Jungkook? Don't you know what you mean?
For him? Don't you see that it hurts us all too? Don't you...
all?"
I didn't want to pressure him too much, but I was really...
annoyed. It wasn't entirely his fault. He was
He was annoyed that he was on crutches. The injuries were
inevitable, but also fatal for the dancers.
I thought I had been alert, but I injured myself in a
An unexpected moment. It was my fault. No one else could have been.
blamed for it. I knew he would be nervous and aware.
I would feel pain in my ankle every time I danced, and that would discourage me.
Otherwise, I would hurt myself again. And yet, I couldn't.
to get away from that. I couldn't live without dancing. I had to
to keep dancing despite being discouraged and hurt.
"It's time to stop running away. If you're going to run away again, don't..."
never come back"
I turned around and crossed the street. "HoSeok." I thought
I heard him calling me, but I didn't look back. Always
I had blamed myself for everything that went wrong. Always
I thought I should have done this or endured it.
I didn't want to live like that anymore.
YoonGi
July 25, Year 22
I opened my eyes in the middle of the night. It was raining.
The curses came out of my mouth automatically.
When I got up from the floor, I stood still for a while.
My whole body was soaked with rain. I felt
shivering and cold everywhere.
"If you're going to run away again, never come back." The voice
HoSeok's voice echoed in my ears. All I could remember
It was after Jungkook left the hospital that
I continued to hesitate, stumble over things, and fall.
Manipulated by drunkenness, headaches, the
Fear and despair filled me; I didn't know how long it had been.
I didn't even know what had happened or where I was. That's when I...
I met HoSeok. At that moment, I felt
drowned. He was half happy and half relieved. Because
For some reason, I believed he would be able to understand me.
confusion and my fear, even though he couldn't understand me
myself.
But HoSeok looked away. He was pretending not to.
had seen me. Soon the signal changed and I was left
watching him walk away. Then someone pushed me and I fell into the
floor. I heard people shouting and clicking their tongues.
"Why didn't you go see Jungkook? Don't you know what..."
What do you mean to him? "Of course, I knew. Maybe that's why..."
I couldn't get into his room. It was broken and
Thorny. Anyone who tried to approach me was...
destined to get hurt.
I raised my head and looked at the desolate path of the
mountain. There were two directions. I could walk further.
deep in the mountain, or I could turn around and go back down.
I started moving toward the dark forest. I always
I risked the fork in the road. I had no destination.
I lost track of time. Maybe I was just going around in circles.
in circles. It felt like my knees were giving way.
at any moment due to the cold and fatigue. I was without
my breath was coming in, and my heart was beating. What would happen if I...
Will I collapse here to die? Well, yes, I am destined to.
To die here, then this is where I will die. I sank.
Raindrops fell on my face. I was so
dark with my eyes open like when they were
closed. I was drowning in layers of darkness.
I thought about death again and again. I wanted to escape from them.
fears and desires that continued to haunt me. I wanted
to run so far away from that terrifying essence that attracted me
unable to do anything, but unable to look directly,
That agony that pushed me from one extreme to the other. Now
It must be the right time. Everything happened for the best.
I inflicted pain on others as I suffered more.
Pain. I looked away from her wounds. I didn't want to assume
no responsibility. I didn't want to get involved. That
That was who I was. This moment must be a blessing.
for everyone. I blinked slowly and began to fall asleep.
The cold, the pain, and the fatigue disappeared. And I
I fell asleep amidst the darkness, the light, and my surroundings.
Everything went dark.
I opened my eyes again when I heard the sound of a
piano. Everything was silent except for the sounds of
The raindrops falling and the leaves rustling.
Amidst the silence, the fragile and delicate sounds of
They continued walking towards me. Anyone?
playing the piano deep in the mountains in the middle
of the night? I thought it was a hallucination, but
continued.
I smiled; it was that melody. That melody that so many...
I had tried to remember. That essential something that was missing,
which kept me awake all night
days and days. Why was it reaching me at this moment?
Every time? I concentrate more, but the melody
It was barely audible, distant, and interrupted by sound.
From the rain. I started coughing.
I tried to get up, but I stopped. What would I do now?
Even if I could discern the melody? What would change?
Even if I finished my music? I never wanted to be
To be recognized by others, to receive applause, or to be famous.
I never wanted to prove myself. So what?
What would completing this piece mean?
But I got up from the ground with one hand and headed
towards the direction from which the sound came. He was
I was staggering and my body was trembling. My face and my
My hands were numb. I couldn't feel my legs.
None of my body parts seemed to be under my...
control. But I took firm steps, one at a time, to get closer.
to the melody.
Heavy raindrops struck my head.
The shirt was wet. Every joint and muscle
They seemed to be screaming. My legs were trembling so violently.
I couldn't lift my feet off the ground. My feet...
They slid across the wet grass, and thorny twigs
They brushed against my shoulders. I felt cold to the core and almost
I collapsed. My pace slowed down and slowed down.
The piano melody had been fading with each step.
that gave.
I vigorously increased my pace to find the
source of the music before it stopped. It had
fear that, if he did, he would never be able to return
I listened to her. I marched forward without being able to make out the
Forest path. I was shocked by the fallen branches.
Then, suddenly, my knees buckled and I fell to the ground.
I was on the floor. I was so out of breath I felt like I was going to throw up.
All my senses returned quickly, and I felt the cold.
fatigue and the strange surroundings deep within the
mountain so vividly. As I accelerated my
The rhythm increased more and more as it struck against branches.
As my feet slid more forcefully, the
The piano sound became clearer. The more intense it was…
The pain was greater, the sound was louder.
I finally stopped walking after wandering under the
It rained for hours. The melody was brought to life even more.
vividly. It exploded in my head when it combined.
with what I had been composing until a few days ago
days. I covered my head with both arms and sank down.
It was closer to emotion than to music.
It stimulated my pain sense instead of my hearing. It wasa combination of suffering, hope, joy and
Fear. It was everything I had struggled so hard to escape.
Suddenly, a scene from a bright, sunny afternoon
It appeared before my eyes. It was playing a melody.
in front of the piano in my studio. It was that melody that
It kept swirling in my head. "This sounds really good."
Jungkook approached. I laughed. "You always say the same thing."
It wasn't a single melody. It was a combination of
Several memories. From the days when I used to play the
I played the piano keys like a child. From the days when my
My friends were dancing in sync with my performance in the hall.
storage converted into a classroom. From the days in
I stayed up all night writing pieces.
and I inhaled the fresh morning air. My piano was at my side.
side in every happy moment. These happy memories
They always ended up being torn to pieces, but not
could be denied.
What would completing this piece mean? Not yet.
I was able to find the answer. But something preceded it.
to this question and the answer. I wanted to capture all of this.
before it dispersed into the air. It wasn't for
not to please anyone, not even to try something. It wasn't even
For me. I just wanted to capture this emotion, pain, and fear.
that were about to explode in my head and heart,
With music. It didn't have to signal the beginning of something.
It wasn't supposed to mean anything. I just wanted to complete this.
music.
The sound of the piano was no longer audible. The rain was
gradually decreasing, but my body was trembling
uncontrollably. I closed my eyes and felt that everything
surrounded me even more vividly. The raindrops that
They fell on my cheeks, splashed the floor, and flowed
in a stream, the cold wind, the smell of earth, the sound of
The leaves. And my breathing. When I got up, it appeared
the sign of the mineral spring. I thought I had wandered
deep in the mountains, but I was back.
where it had begun. And the road still stretched on.
two opposite directions. I turned my steps towards the
direction from where the sun rose.
JiMin
July 28, Year 22
I checked the inside of Two Star Burger. HoSeok no
It was in plain sight. Four days had passed since the
last time he showed up in the practice room. Someone
I mentioned that he told my dance partner that he would take
a break, but after that she didn't respond to the
He didn't call anyone. He didn't even read the messages.
posted in the Just Dance group chat.
He knew his ankle was bothering him. Maybe it was
That night. The night my dance partner turned out to be
Hurt because of me. It had rained that night, and he took her.
Standing with his back to the hospital in the rain. His condition must be
have worsened.
When I entered the restaurant, the workers...
They greeted them cheerfully. "Is Hoseok out today?"
They said he was on sick leave.
probably for three weeks, but they weren't
insurance. Her ankle worsened. She had to wear a cast, and the
The manager recommended that he take some time off.
I ran straight to her house. I couldn't wait for her to...
The bus was coming, so I went up the hill. It was a long time ago.
It was hot that day. My back was dripping with sweat. I threw myself into the
It was sunny and very hot. It was closed. I left a
message in our group chat. "Where are you?"
"HoSeok?" By the end of the day, he still hadn't answered.
YoonGi
July 28, Year 22
I was finally able to get up in the afternoon. I suffered from
severe chills for two days after getting off the plane
The mountain. I couldn't remember any details of those two.
days. I trembled and shivered with fever. Sometimes I returned to
myself, but I quickly pleaded for conscience
again.
My sheet was soaked. I still felt
dizzy. I left my studio, trying to stay calm.
Firm. I went to the hospital to receive an injection.
I had an IV and then choked on food. But I threw it up.
Everything again. I read Jimin's message while I was...
He washed his mouth in the bathroom. Although the number next to the
The message dropped, there were no replies.
I walked along the railway and arrived at the stop of
bus. There was an unfinished building in the distance. The
Construction had been halted for months. The store
The music room was a little further up the hill afterwards
I stopped in front of the store after passing by that building.
There was no music. No crackling sound of flames or
A clumsy and slow piano performance. It didn't have the
energy to bend down, pick up a stone, and throw it.
It all seemed like a distant past and made me wonder if
It had really happened. I could see a piano through
the display window.
"Don't you see that we're all hurting too? Don't you see that?"
That's what HoSeok said the other day. The memories ofThat day everything was jumbled up in my head. But I remembered
Clearly, Hoseok was something different. He wasn't the
This was the first time HoSeok had ever been angry with me. Never before.
I had been so close, but I had always
He was pushed, pulled, and encouraged every time he fell. Why?
Did it feel different?
I opened Jimin's message again. "Where are you?"
HoSeok?" Several hours had passed, but HoSeok hadn't
I had answered. I could see that I had disappointed him.
I felt as if something inside me was moving and
going around in circles. HoSeok often got angry and we
She encouraged. But she had never fallen silent, nor had she
He looked away. He was the one who always opened the door.
I walked so that I would return, no matter how far I went.
I would have lost it. Not this time. This seemed irrevocable.
time.
NamJoon
August 7, Year 22
I turned on the light and looked at the steering wheel, which was attached to...
the door of my container. It read "redevelopment" and
"Demolition." People must be talking about the
remodeling this area again. It was always talked about.
to demolish the containers that lined the railway
and the buildings occupied by the railway. I crumpled the
I picked up the steering wheel and threw it in the trash. The talk about the
The redevelopment didn't start yesterday. But it was always simmering.
as if the demolition were to take place the next day and
then it will calm down shortly afterwards.
I put my bag down and lay on the floor. A while has passed.
time since sunset, but the interior of the
The container was still hot. I spent every night.
Here after visiting Jungkook. It felt exhausting.
My nose bled from time to time. I washed my face.
But I always came here instead of the small room.
back of the gas station.
No one else had opened that door and entered.
Perhaps no one would ever do it. Everyone who gathers
They must separate, without exception. It could have been ours.
shift. But, if anyone still felt the need to
"We" were together, I wanted to send her a sign
that I was here. I wanted to show him that "our"
The hideout was still here. Still alive.
Tae Hyung
August 11, Year 22
I left the convenience store after finishing.
my turn. I usually took out my phone, but not
There were no missed calls or messages. It was dark, and the
The street was full of people hurrying by.
I put both hands in my pockets and kept walking.
A stifling wind swept across the road. I began to sweat.
After taking a few steps, how much longer will it take?
Last this summer? I kicked the ground in frustration.
I continued walking with my head bowed.
And I stopped in front of a familiar-looking wall. It was
The wall where that girl drew her first graffiti.
I automatically looked around. From that night on,
When I left her in the alley and walked out in front of the headlights of the
patrol car, I hadn't seen her in my neighborhood again.
I discovered a large "X" sprayed over his graffiti.
while trying to find his footprints. What
What did it mean? Several images overlap with the "X"
of graffiti. The image of her laughing at me when
I tried to lie down on the railway and hit my head.
And how she helped me get up. When I helped her escape.
and fall. How he lost his patience when I took his bread and
I ate it. How sad he looked every time I passed by.
Photo studio with family photos in
exhibition. I told him while we were spraying this wall one
next to each other, "Don't think you have to carry the burden
"Alone. Share it with others." The gigantic "X" was
sprinkled over all those memories. It seemed to scream thatThey were fake. That they were all lies. I had never seen that before.
this wall since that day.
I was about to turn around when I discovered
a short sentence written in lowercase characters
Under the "X". It's not your fault, it seemed to have been.
scratched on the wall. It was that girl. I didn't see her write it or
I knew his handwriting, but I knew it. "It's not your fault." It was
that girl.
I remembered the day I blindly set off to look for my mother.
I continued marching frantically, filled with resentment,
But in the end, I couldn't get anywhere. While
I was walking back home empty-handed, I returned
Her head turned toward the city where she lived. The city
He was retreating into the dawning daylight.
This. I felt like crying. Something I had been thinking about.
clinging tightly, it seemed to be slipping between
My fingers. Lumps of hard feelings crumbled.
silently. I felt sad and distressed, as if
I would have given up something that shouldn't be abandoned.
"It's not your fault." The phrase reminded me of how I...
I felt that way at that moment. I started walking again.
I passed through narrow alleyways and went up and down countless stairs.
pending. Finally, my house, Magnolia Mansion,
It came into view. I went upstairs. When I stopped
Standing in front of the door, I could hear the heavy breathing of
Dad and the clinking of liquor glasses. I turned around, put
I placed my hands on the railing and looked outside. The sun was already rising.
It had been applied. Its faint red tint was fading.from the darkening sky. "It's not your fault," I murmured. I breathed
Deep down, I turned around and went into my house.
HoSeok
August 12, Year 22
Someone pushed my shoulder as I got off the train.
I dropped the ticket I was holding. It fell onto the
railway and slipped into one of the cracks. I looked
around. It was the middle of summer when I left and I was still there.
It was summer. The train departed for the next station.
stirring the wind.
At the end of last month, I left Songju by train from
This platform. I watched as the city receded into the distance.
The window. As far as I can remember, I lived in Songju.
I never left the city and I never imagined living anywhere else.
I went to the burger place and the practice room on time.
After dancing for hours, I went home and
I fell apart. Although the town was small, in Songju
I had a place I had to go, a place where I had to
be.
After my ankle was injured, my daily routine
It all fell apart. I went to work and to the practice room with a
A soft cast was applied. My ankle condition worsened. With a
I had a full cast; I had to take sick leave.
I had three whole weeks of doing absolutely nothing. Three
weeks without work, without dancing, and nowhere to go.
I managed to survive the morning of
first day. The rain that fell throughout the
Night stopped at dawn. I cleaned the house and organized.
my clothes. I cut my hair and cleaned the rainwater from the
I sat on a bench across from my house. But I ran out of things to do.In the afternoon. My phone didn't ring. Some messages from
my coworkers and the members of Just Dance
They were the only ones who entered. However, there were no...
No calls or messages from others. Now that I think about it,
I was always the one who contacted the others first.
I silenced my phone. I didn't want to contact them first.
What would happen if neither of them sent a message?
So be it. I remembered how I had met...
YoonGi the night before. What I blurted out was repeated in my
head. I jumped up and shouted into the air. "Don't do it!"
He'll remember anyway!
The way home seemed longer than usual.
After leaving YoonGi there, I had to go up the hill.
on crutches. Although the sun had set, the air felt
It was stifling. It was also humid. It was soaked with...
I was sweating when I got home. I didn't regret what I did.
she had told YoonGi. It was time for him to stop.
to give in to self-pity. But those moments, those
words kept coming back to me.
From the rooftop, I could look out over the city. The train
It passed through the center and disappeared around the corner.
corner, at the foot of the mountain. I carelessly threw my
I packed my clothes in a bag and headed to the station. I flipped through the list.
of cities opposite the ticket office and I chose the most
large nearby. I thought it would be better to move to the big
city. And so, I left Songju.
I got off the train after about two hours. So
As soon as I left the station, I came across a
Busy intersection. Rows of skyscrapers and the
People who were passing under the bright sun appeared
in sight. I took the first bus that stopped in front of
my.
"Where do I get off?" The driver looked at me as if
I was talking nonsense. A passenger asking
their own destiny? Yes, I must have sounded stupid.
After about twenty minutes, the bus arrived at a
A neighborhood that looked like an old part of the city. I left my
bag in a small room attached to a market
It had a sign that said "Guest House." I went outside.
I couldn't tell which direction was which.
I ended up wandering around the neighborhood during the
First two days. There were no tall buildings or a district.
The commercial area was well-lit. It was similar to my neighborhood.
where my room was on the rooftop. I chose to leave
I visited Songju for the first time in my life and arrived at another Songju.
Perhaps that was the reason. I tried not to think about the city and
The people I had left behind, but I lost control.
I turned on my phone and thought about the others. I could have...
I left Songju, but my mind was still there.
On the third day, I decided to venture further. But in
less than twenty minutes after leaving the market,
My shoulders began to stiffen with the crutches.
Beneath them. Sweat ran down my back in the sun.
Scorching. A red brick building came into view.
It was the community meeting room. While pressing
The vending machine button was pressed, and the door opened.
from the auditorium and several people left. The sound of the
Music flowed through the open door. I could see a man.stretching out in a corner of the stage under the spotlights
illuminating his head.
I was heading to the auditorium before I realized it.
When I closed the door behind me, I was left alone in
The darkness and the music. I sat in the most exclusive seat.
nearby. The sound of the music flowed through the air like
Overlapping waves. The man on stage moved.
slowly and stretched her legs, ankles, arms, neck and
shoulders. The stretch, which lasted for
For quite some time, it seemed like a piece of choreography in itself.
Then the music stopped. The man who was
Sitting on the floor, he stood up and walked towards the center.
from the stage. The atmosphere was enveloped in silence.
for a while.
The music started again. This time, it went down.
torrents. The man sped up and slowed his movements.
The music. Her arms and legs formed not only lines
not straight lines and curves, but three-dimensional forms. A
one moment led to another through their movements and
Dynamic gestures. Their movements created a story.
which seemed endless. He pushed aside the air with his
hands and sent vibrations through the ground, which sent
adrenaline not to my eyes but to my mind.
The pitch of the music became increasingly lower and led
The man was driven to a greater explosion of emotion. He roared.
Rage filled her with all her might; she held her breath and looked at something.
distant. Their suffering, hope, joy, and fear were
Transmitted unfiltered. Feelings never before experienced.
I had experienced sprouted and swirled inside me.
I didn't know how much time had passed. The light of
The auditorium lights were on. I sat motionless.
Someone approached me and asked me to leave because the
The dancers were rehearsing. The outsiders couldn't.
to stay. The poster presenting the Academy of
Dance was attached to the entrance of the Hall of the
Citizens. The man on stage did not appear in the
poster. The performance was scheduled for last
tomorrow.
I returned to the guesthouse and lay down on the
I closed my eyes and thought about the large bench in the backyard.
Those hours in the auditorium. It was my first time seeing one.
A truly memorable performance. It was an experience...
completely different from what I had seen through
That little window called YouTube. It could have been
I was even more amazed because he was so lively and energetic.
I retraced every movement and gesture that made my heart beat.
heart.
At that moment, my phone rang in my pocket.
"Where are you, HoSeok?" It was Jimin's message.
The number next to the message gradually decreased, but not
No further messages were posted after that. What should I do?
What do you mean? I'd always explained it jokingly, but this time…
This time I didn't want to do it. It was the first time I hadn't.
replied to a message addressed to me. Our chat
The group fell silent.
I went to the auditorium at the same time the next day.
I hid in the darkness and observed the movements of the
Man. It was the same performance, but it conveyed a different story and different emotions. Who was he?
How could I express and convey all those things?
Feelings like that? The rehearsal ended. When
I entered the hallway and met the man's eyes.
when I was talking to the staff members
way ahead. I leaned over without realizing it. A
A staff member approached me and said, "Oh, you're..."
"the boy from yesterday."
The performance took place the following day. But the
The man wasn't into it. The performance, which had four...
chapters, it didn't show it. The show lasted more than one
hour, and I clapped and shouted several times from my seat. But
That was it. I couldn't relive that overwhelming moment.
that warmed my heart and froze my body. None of that.
It could be compared to his incredible moves. Why?
What didn't I join in the performance? I walked across the stage.
after the performance, but there were only members of
staff and dancers who gave orders.
I met with the performance team again.
at the train station. I was going up to the platform.
to go to another city and I saw a group of people
They were meeting remotely. Obviously, they had problems.
to load the stage sets and all the equipment into the
train. I didn't have a specific purpose when I went and helped them.
It was just that they seemed confused and inexperienced, and I
She was used to fixing and moving things. The cast
She stood in my way, but I was better than her.
Most of those standing there were stunned. "You are
"That boy again," I looked around and found him.
staff member
"I didn't even thank you properly." The member
A member of the staff approached my seat shortly after
The train was leaving. He slumped into the seat next to him and said that
Almost half the staff had left because things
They got complicated. He added that they wouldn't have made it without me.
Help. He pointed to my cast and asked if it wasn't too much.
Stress on my ankle. I just shook my hand.
"By the way, that man I saw at the rehearsal. Why didn't he..."
"Was I at the presentation?" He seemed confused.
beginning. Then he nodded. "Ah, him. He's our director."
"artistic" The staff member's explanation
It continued again and again. How he had been an acclaimed
dancer. How he had suffered a terrible injury. How
had suffered years of despair and frustration.
"Do you know the most surprising part? It surprised everyone."
and made a comeback as a choreographer and director. But
The injury had left a lasting impact. He couldn't
to perform on stage again." The member of
The staff sighed deeply. It was getting dark.
outside the window.
I came to join and tour with the show.
By coincidence. I helped them unload their luggage at the
at the next station, and my bag was swept away in the process.
Fortunately, I had the number of one of the
staff members. I got off at the next station,
I returned in the car they had gotten off and went to their accommodation. It was
Late at night. I was invited to spend the night with
them. I had breakfast with them the next morning and went to the
District Cultural Center, which was its next headquarters.
The staff's proposal to join them and do
A tour together must have been done as part of a
Joke. I also entertained myself by joking around. In that
At that moment, he began his practice. I watched him without
understand. And then I asked them, "Can I really go?"
with you?"
I traveled to three cities with them. We took a bus.
or a train, we get off, unpack at a motel, we
We stuffed ourselves with food, we checked the scene
At the performance venue, we returned to the motel and went back
to get on the bus or train. The man stretched and
He practiced every day, no matter where he was.
He never jumped on stage, although he didn't go up to perform in the
scenery.
I made friends with the staff members and the
dancers. Their dances and mine were different, but
We share the passion of expressing what we feel.
through movement. We're talking about dancing on the train and
While we were waiting for the bus, we chatted about...
We watched our favorite dancers' videos together.
I finally managed to speak to him when I was...
showing the staff a video in Just Dance
practicing.
"Are you a dancer?" I looked around and he was standing there.
There. I stood up, leaning forward slightly. I looked at him.
I didn't know how to answer her question. I hesitated to admit
I told him I was a dancer too. "You're a..."
"Dancer." She said, pointing at me in the video. That's how
I managed to talk to him. "Why do you like to dance?" I nervously dragged out the end of my sentence. "Well, that..."
"It's... you know..." The man asked me when I started
to dance. I told her I was in a talent show.
at school when I was about twelve years old.
My colleagues had dragged me onto the stage.
My body began to move automatically. I
I was even more moved by the applause and cheers of the
audience. I couldn't think of anything else. I had just
move spontaneously. After the music
When it was over, I looked ahead, running my fingers over my...
My hair was soaked in sweat. I felt as if I had…
I vomited up all the lumps that were obstructing my bowels.
heart. It felt refreshing and rewarding. It took me
It took me a long time to realize how exciting it was,
and that this feeling did not come from the applause of the
audience, but from the depths of my being.
The man pointed at me in the video and said that he
They liked my movements. "Not all dancers
"They can move like that." I saw myself in the video. I liked how
I could see myself when I danced. I could fly through the air from the
I want to free myself from the eyes and criteria of the world.
Nothing was important to me, except moving my body.
to the rhythm of the music and communicate my feelings to
through him. Offstage, he was bound by so many
things, I couldn't just stay in the air with my feet on the ground
floor. I had to smile and laugh even when I was
annoyed or sad. He used to collapse in the street, taking
medications I didn't need. There were times when
that allowed me to reveal who I really was. Moments in which
I thought I could be happy again. Moments when I could let go of everything that weighed me down and fly high.
Moments when I was able to reach unimaginable heights in the
stage. Dancing gave me those moments.
"I heard you overcame a serious injury." The man told me
He stared. He knew he was being rude, but
I had to ask him. The man looked at my cast and at